Saturday, January 31, 2009

I haven't been ice blocking since...

There was one time I went ice blocking with some friends, and it was the last time I ever went ice blocking. For those unaware, you can take ice blocks and put towels on them, you sit on them and you can slide down a hill. It's like sledding in the summer with wetter results. Well this hill had been ice blocked pretty heavily so the whole hill was wet and slick. I was up and I started going down, it became too fast and my ice block came out from under me, but I kept going on the wet grass. That is until my rear end collided with a sprinkler head tearing it clean off and creating a water fountain. I had a large gash on my bum after that. That is why I will never ice block again.

Friday, January 30, 2009

Friday: TV Day

Each week I'll talk about things I watch that week, whether it be for the week or something I just watched in the week. However this week I'm going to go for two weeks worth, mainly just for the first two shows.

TV Talk: Week Prior to Jan 30th 2009

There were two big shows coming back which have made me very happy.

LOST -- Lost returned for it's fifth season last week and did two episodes and then had a third episode this week. It is exciting since it's one of my favorite shows, and during all three episodes I had moments where I literally said out loud, "That's so cool!" Many people are saying this show could be the ultimate disappointment if it doesn't end well, but for me personally, I just get excited during the episodes and so at this point it doesn't matter if some things go unanswered, it's too much fun watching each day's episodes. For those familiar with the show they've somewhat stopped doing the person per episode format and are more so focusing on just telling the rest of the story which I'm really happy with. My friend Mark had said something he wanted more of and that's Sayid doing more ass kicking, well there is plenty of that in these episodes. Also it's making Desmond into an even more interesting character even though I didn't think it could be possible. If you're into this show, then you're already hooked. So keep watching.

Battlestar Gallactica -- Battlestar came back for it's final ten episodes of the series and is airing every friday night. So far I've watched the first two episodes and I have no idea how they are going to end it out. The reveal of who the fifth and final cylon was, was excellent. Also all of the reveals in the first episode back just kept bringing a smile to my face. This is one of the best shows currently on television and they've been really good about who they choose to do what. It's been really nice. There were some really shocking moments and it's really doing a good job. I can't wait to see how it ends, and I'm excited that a show I do currently like is ending in the next eight weeks.

24 is back and in it's seventh season. It's a decent show and I still watch it each week, but I'm no where near the level of people who call it the Jack Bauer power hour. This show is an alright show with nothing really special to it. Only once in the first five episodes has anything actually surprised me, and it was just a cool move that Bauer did while lying down in the front of a car. 24 enthusiasts for the most part only like 24 and The Office so I don't really listen to them.

Sunday Night Fox cartoons are back with new episodes of American Dad and The Simpsons. The Simpsons is in it's 20th season right now and is being frontlined by the really funny Bill Odenkirk. Having this guy behind it has actually made the show decently funny again. It's a completely different feel from the classic episodes around season 5, but it's an enjoyable little time. American Dad is in it's 4th season and it's not all that great, basically it's always aimed around Roger the alien, and that's the only character they ever know what to do with.

Thursday Nights bring us The Office, My Name Is Earl and 30 Rock. The Office and 30 Rock are both excellent shows and My Name is Earl seems to finally be coming to an end soon. It's a show which had some funny moments but is overall just not all that great.

Psych is back on friday nights and is just as good as it was when it started. The characters and the writing for this show are just excellent, and they're doing a nice slow build to two of the main characters getting into a relationship.

A surprise show which is actually quite good is the Star Wars: Clone Wars cartoon which shows on cartoon network. It's up to episode 15, but I'm still back on 10. The past couple of episodes have had some really good animation fights and some pretty decent stories to tell. I sorta wish it took place at a different time in the series, but it's still actually quite decent and a must if you're a true blue Star Wars fan.

I marathoned two series recently, the first is the first season of How I Met Your Mother. There are five main characters to the show, and the two main ones are just plain awful. They are awful actors and have nothing funny about them. The charm of this show are in the other three who are all seasoned tv show actors. Jason Segel from the show Freaks and Geeks, Alyson Hannigan from the Buffy series, and Neil Patrick Harris from Doogie Howser. Each of these three actors pull of excellent comedy. Also Bob Saget is the narrator which has a nice feel to it. So it's a decent show which is funny when it features those characters, but the other two are just no good.

The other show I marathoned were the first two seasons of The Big Bang Theory. This is a nice little show about a bunch of nerds and a social hot girl who lives across the hall. This is a good show for nerds as the nerd characters are really well written and have a lot of true nerdology to them. So if you consider yourself to be really nerdy or geeky then you should check out the show, otherwise don't bother.

For now that's good but stay tuned for more next week.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Hank

My name is Adam and I am one of the last. It feels like forever since I lived a normal life but it only started a month ago. His name was Hank and he was a contestant on America's Next Talent. They had never seen such a good ventriloquist before in their lives. He could take puppets and make them say all sorts of amazing things. If youtube was still around i would give you a link, but the internet has been down for two weeks. Before long Hank had won the hearts of the American people and had won the competition. He had the largest number of text votes any reality show has ever seen. Then he went on tour with all the other finalists, he headlined each show and each show was sold out. I was confused by this since I found him to be a mediocre Ventriloquist at best, and really, no one actually likes it do they? Well, turns out I was right, no one actually liked it.

On the last day, the day before the internet died 95% of the sites were dedicated to Hank. I went to a site I had known of which showed earlier editions of websites, and I found one which had come out just a week earlier, one warning of his coming. This site warned of the Ventriloquist who had uncanny powers. He could make anyone into his dummy. There were many theories on how he did this, but it seems physically erecting his arm into the cavities of others was for the most part regarded as the true method. Though I still doubt the legitimacy of such events as he wouldn't have been able to shove his arm up six billion, sorry, I digress. The site I was mentioning is now a website which labels Hank and Ron Paul for the presidency in 2012.

I first noticed it in my life when my friend Gene texted me at all hours of the night, "Have u checked out this Hank mofro? He's teh zombors!!1!" I knew something was up because Gene had a Masters in English and was a stout teetotaler. I did not reply and within half an hour my doorbell had rung. Gene was at the door, spittle and dried spittle caked his mouth, there was a vacant stare about him and he was not carrying his usual dictionary in his left hand. "Adam, Hank is teh Zombors!" I looked at my friend perplexed and then he grabbed a hold of me and with the weight of his body pushed me to the ground. We struggled for a while but I was able to wrestle his library worn shriveled carcass off of me and run for the hills.

I had a cave from my days in spelunking of which I kept a backup generator and an emergency kit in case I needed to get away for a while. I had done this once before when I didn't have the gall to tell Kelly that I wasn't interested in her anymore. So this time I came extra prepared. I have been living here in my cave dwelling for a week, I will go out once in a while to search for signs of life, I found an abandoned cafe which I can get to about once a week and use my wireless to try and get a signal. All I can find is the Hankternet however, it seems he has taken over the world. I try not to stay online too long as I'm sure they're able to track my signal. I've set up this blog full of Hank propaganda, in hopes that someone who isn't under Hank's influence can find it and tell my story, just in case we live through this. Of course I do realize my story isn't all that interesting as I've only lived in a cave dwelling for a week living off of cans of soup and sprite. But still hopefully I will be able to live a life of semblance again. Good luck to all those who are trying to fight the good fight. I will never give in to a Ventriloquist as long as I live. This is Adam, signing out, comment please.

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This post is an installment in a continuing series of content coordinated by theme or motif with posts from Enoch Allred of Chiltingham, John Allred of clol Town, Jon Fairbanks of Funkadelic Freestylings of Another Sort, Eli Z. McCormick and Miriam Allred of Modern Revelation!, John D. Moore of Whatnot Studios, Joseph Schlegel of Sour Mayonnaise, Sven Patrick Svensson of Sadness? Euphoria?, and William C. Stewart of Chide, Chode, Chidden. This week's theme: 'Ventriloquism'.

Wednesday: Music Shuffle

So wednesday is the music shuffle day, this is being posted on thursday but only because I came into it late, I would have done it yesterday morning. Basically how this works is I will listen to ten songs on random on my iTunes and comment on each of the songs. If there are versions of the songs online I'll post them for you to hear.

Oh wow, I can't believe that all of them have close to versions on the net. Only the String Cheese one is different.

1. Phish -- Train Song -- A really short one by Phish, at just two and a half minutes. I really like the chorus of this one but not as big a fan of the verses. The cool thing about this song is it proves Phish can do shorter songs and try different things. If you do like this song the rest of the album is along the same kind of vein, very light and airy. I'll listen to this song on random once in a while but I don't usually go seeking it out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=slFTgYP9IDA

2. String Cheese Incident -- Old Home Place -- Another Jam Band and another short one. This is in my top five favorite songs by SCI, this is the closest thing I have to country music that I actually really like. Of course it's still more jammy then country will ever be. It's a nice length and a nice song to get on random. I tend to forget about my love of String Cheese Incident until I get them on random.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gK0iMLvCfFM
Tony Rice doing the song

3. BT -- Knowledge of Self -- Over the summer I had a secret desire to get into techno, I was told Trance or House would be what I would like so I got a big amount of Techno. I ended up deleting most of it as I found I didn't like it. However BT was one artist which I kept, one because he records with other artists like Mike Doughty of Soul Coughing, but also because he's just one of the better artists when it comes to the genre. This one is decently enjoyable for the genre, and it's nice because there are some words to it as well, rapping mixed with techno seems like a perfect fit.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJZQ1fUUn14

4. David Bowie -- Queen Bitch -- I got into this song because of The Life Aquatic and have just fallen in love with it. I have yet to really get into the rest of Bowie, but I hope to soon enough. This is a classic song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9cGG6aimgw

5. Propellerheads -- Bring Us Together -- I bought a Propellerheads album off of a recommendation but needed to get the remix done by them of super bon bon so I downloaded a full discography. This song is off some EP and it's incredibly repetitive and I'm thinking of deleting after I listen to it for the first time now. I probably will.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAdYhTsThP0

6. Lyrics Born -- Explosive -- Lyrics Born is pretty much my favorite rapper and so pretty much everything he does is excellent to me. He put out an album you can only get through his website called the Variety Show which is in my top 3 favorite rap albums. This song is a nice short quick rap song with some good licks.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=793EXCQ8zJc

7. Michael Jackson -- We Are Here To Change The World -- Oh man this song is rockin', I've never heard this one before. A good quick dance tune with Michael's trademark high voice hits.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ztzi-OBU7lA

8. Jellyfish -- Bye Bye Bye -- I just picked this up from Patrick so this is the first time I've heard this song. This is my old audio teacher's favorite band. I'm really liking the elaborate nature of the song, it's complexities and it's light hearted nature. It makes me really wanna check more out of this band.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5FqFaR2TCJw

9. Ozomatli -- Dejame En Paz -- This is one of my favorites from the band Ozomatli, it's a fast joyous type song. All in Spanish but it doesn't matter because you can tell they had so much fun making the song that it's just infectious.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cRbB7jVtBJU (Live Version)

10. Sasha -- Deep Progress -- Sasha is a techno fellow who put out an amazing album called Airdrawndagger which is the best techno album I've ever heard. A bunch of his stuff was included in the techno download I got and so this is from some underground disc. It sounds like his style, but this is also the first time I've ever heard this one. This one isn't all that great on first listen, I mean it's okay but not up to snuff on his other stuff.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3_tXqjBidvA

Daily Content 3.0

This time around I'm unveiling a different kind of daily content. This time around it will be themed days. I have a different theme for each day, so stay tuned as I'll be doing daily stuff, but in a weekly format. So here for you all is the lineup.

Monday -- Movie Review (For a movie I have watched that week)
Tuesday -- Album Review (An album I have listened to that week)
Wednesday -- iTunes Shuffle Commentary (I'll put my itunes on random and comment on ten songs at random)
Thursday -- Content Themed Writing (Done with other people, some creative writing based on a theme.)
Friday -- TV for the week. (Reviewing what television shows I watched that week)
Saturday -- Personal Narrative (Whether it be about my life or a commentary on something that's giving me an emotion)
Sunday -- Random Posting (It can be one of the above or any other posting, like website reviews, video games. Anything I feel.)

So there you have it. Tonight, I will start with the wednesday content and then continue from there. I hope you enjoy this time around.

Daily Content of another sort...

So I've been milling about this idea in my head and today I think due to other's doing cool things as well, I think I'm going to do a daily content again, however, this time around I'm going to do more of a weekly feature for each day of the week. So for instance I will do the weekly writing feature with friends on thursday, maybe do an album review on tuesday, do a personal narrative on saturday and so on and so forth. So I've been milling about it and will probably put a somewhat official listing tomorrow and see how it goes. If anyone has any ideas on categories to be done let me know.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Moment I just had

So my roommate likes to "talk" when I exit the bathroom, which makes it very awkward for me. What does he decide to talk about this time? Apparently there was a homicide on his bus route today. So because I'm uncomfortable what do I instinctively do? I laugh. And he looks at me in horror and says, "It's not funny, it's sad." And I quickly run back into my room.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Eifen Deifeiffen

2 people are discussing something over coffee.

1: So how goes your sitcom?
2: Awful, I'm losing viewers with every episode.
1: Dude, that sucks.
2: I know, and you know what the worst part of it is?
1: What?
2: I think it's because I'm being too real.
1: Too Real.
2: Yeah, like you know how, "Uh Oh, I'm at some girl's house and my girlfriend just called on the phone!" and then something wacky ends up happening.
1: Yeah that's a usual.
2: Yeah, I write in the my characters turn their phone off before they go over, or they check who's calling before answering, or they have some amount of sense about them to not cheat on their girlfriends."
1: Eifen Deifeiffen.

There is a longer then usual pause.

2:What?
1:Hmmm?
2: What did you just say?
1: I didn't say anything.
2: Yes you did.
1: When?
2: Just now, I said how my characters don't cheat on their girlfriends and you said some nonsense words.
1: Well if you knew what I said why did you ask me what I said.

There is another longer then usual pause.

2: Okay, I think I'm going to have my characters keep their phones on from now on.
1: That a boy.
2: Yeah, good talk, I'll see you.

2 walks out of frame, 1 gives a confident smile.

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This post is an installment in a continuing series of content coordinated by theme or motif with posts from Enoch Allred of Chiltingham, John Allred of clol Town, Jon Fairbanks of Funkadelic Freestylings of Another Sort, Eli Z. McCormick of Modern Revelation!, John D. Moore of Whatnot Studios, Joseph Schlegel of Sour Mayonnaise, and William C. Stewart of Chide, Chode, Chidden. This week's theme: 'Eifen Deifeiffen'.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Vice

3 friends sit in an apartment together. Two friends (Jeff and Steve) are playing a video games on the tv and sitting on the couch, they are playing a fighting game. (Zach) is sitting on a chair next to the computer, he is surfing the net.

Jeff: Come on, come on, come on, come on! No!
Steve: Boo Yah Grandma.
Jeff: Dude, I'm totally going to beat you in round two.
Steve: Bring it Granny.
Jeff: Alright, come on, come on, come on, come on, oh, oh oh oh, wait, no no no no, hey, no fair, a Vice! You've got my head in a vice!
Steve: What?
Jeff: You've got my head in a vice, I can't get out of it, oh now I'm dead. Dude that sucks, I couldn't do anything.
Steve: A Vice?
Jeff: Yeah dude, you had my head in a Vice.
Steve: I had your head in a headlock, what the hell is a Vice?
Jeff: Dude, you know what a vice is.
Steve: Yeah, like how prostitution is a Vice.
Jeff: What? That's not what I'm talking about.

Zach chimes in from the computer.

Zach: You mean like Miami Vice, or Grand Theft Auto Vice City?
Jeff: What? No, like as in a clamping device.
Zach: Oh, a De-Vice?
Jeff: No it's something completely different.
Steve: So is that why they call it Miami Vice?
Jeff: What like it's a clamping city?
Steve: No because of the city being full of prostitutes.
Jeff: What?
Zach: Yeah I can see that with Grand Theft Auto cause it is like a Prostitute City.
Jeff: No, what the hell guys, Vices are for clamping things.
Steve: Like Prostitutes.
Jeff: No! Dude, seriously, you had my head in a vice, that was all I was saying.
Steve: Dude, I am not doing that sort of thing to you head! I'm not that kind of guy.
Zach: Okay, hold up, I'll look it up. Alright, on the dictionary on the internet. Vice, noun, an immoral or evil habit or practice, immoral conduct, sexual immorality, like prostitution.
Steve: Told you!
Jeff: Keep reading.
Zach: A fault, defect or shortcoming.
Steve: Like Miami!
Jeff: Shhh!
Zach: a person serving as a buffoon.
Steve: Oh so that's why you had your head in a vice.
Jeff: Dude, shut up, seriously where is my definition?
Zach: Hold on there are two more. A clamping device, usually consisting of two jaws closed or opened by a screw or lever.
Jeff: See! I told you I was right.
Steve: Dude, it was like the eighth one.
Jeff: Still I feel like I've won the moral victory in this one.
Steve: So Zach, what was the last definition.
Zach: A Bad habit, as in a horse.

Suddenly a horse walks in from the other room.

Horse: Seriously guys can you keep it down? I'm trying to get some sleep in here!

A shot is seen of the three characters and the horse smiling and putting their arms up, the sound "whomp wow" is heard.

End

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This post is an installment in a continuing series of content coordinated by theme or motif with posts from Enoch Allred of Chiltingham, John Allred of clol Town, Jon Fairbanks of Funkadelic Freestylings of Another Sort, Eli Z. McCormick of Modern Revelation!, John D. Moore of Whatnot Studios, Joseph Schlegel of Sour Mayonnaise, and William C. Stewart of Chide, Chode, Chidden. This week's theme: 'Vice'.

Thursday, January 08, 2009

Exodus

A large number of Men in wrestling gear are seen crossing the plains, some of them have hand carts, others with bags over their shoulders. A man near the front has a belt on, he is leading the way. A news crew hurries up to his side and begins to interview him as he walks.

Reporter: This is Lindsey Travis for KPLX news, we are here outside of Grand Forks North Dakota as a mass exodus of wrestlers seem to be headed north for some reason, here we are with the World Heavy Weight Champion Thrasher The Beast, Mr. Thrasher your group of wrestlers have been walking for what seems like days, why have you been walking and where have you been walking too?

Thrasher: Well my dear reporter I just want to say we're trying to get out of this state, this state which only hicks and trailer trash come from.

Cut to a family watching tv in their living room. They all boo loudly and point their thumbs down. The mother is holding a sign which says "Dethrone Thrasher"

Cut back to the wrestlers in the field.

Reporter: Yes I understand that you've said your line as you've gone through each state you've walked through, but really, why are you leaving and where are you going to?

Another man quickly cuts in front, he is a debonaire man with a suit and cane.

Ted Debonaire: We are going to a local wrestling ring where I will defeat Thrasher for the World Heavyweight championship and reclaim what is rightfully mine, bringing back prestige to the Championship.

Cut to family cheering in front of tv, mother is holding a sign which says, "Ted is Hot!"

Cut back to the field.

Reporter: Yes well that's nice and good, but seriously now, you're all human beings not just story line characters, so is this all just a publicity stunt or do you actually have a reason for what you are doing.

Thrasher: Well miss, I guess you hadn't heard but our program has been moved from the U.S.A. network to Friday Nights on the C.A.N.A.D.A. network. We're just on our way there.

The reporter stops Thrasher.

Reporter: You aren't serious are you?

Thrasher: When you're champion, you're always serious. Now stand aside you country yokel.

Thrasher pushes her aside as the wrestlers continue their journey.

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This post is an installment in a continuing series of content coordinated by theme or motif with posts from Enoch Allred of Chiltingham, John Allred of clol Town, Eli Z. McCormick of Modern Revelation!, John D. Moore of Whatnot Studios, Joseph Schlegel of Sour Mayonnaise, and William C. Stewart of Chide, Chode, Chidden. This week's theme: 'Exodus'.