Wednesday, December 20, 2006

I'm Expendable

In my family we have three vehicles, one for my mom, one for my dad and one for me, when one of the cars needs to be serviced, I am the expendable one and lose my car. Our truck's clutch went out and usually it takes only a couple days to fix it, however the flu hit the guys at our garage, then they had to remodel one of their three stalls, then a fire caught in another one so they only had one open, then one of the guys in the shop broke his arm in a rock climbing accident which put them back even more, so finally on thursday my dad is going to use his sway to get a BYU car for the weekend, he has to use it for business so he's going on a business trip this week as well. So finally I will have the car back but only because there's no way I can go this weekend without it. Now as I haven't had a car for about two weeks now I find I have no life here in Orem, all my friends are in Salt Lake or Provo, I only have two good friends in Orem, my roommate and my neighbor. My roommate that is in that wonderful state of Love, you know, Love, the one that consumes your entire body and makes you a void. I never see him, which is fine, cause usually I have a car and can leave. Then my neighbor, who is awesome, but is also a workin man, and so is also gone quite a bit. This leaves me to myself in Orem with no friends. Some people have stopped by, but I feel so trapped without a means of getting anywhere, there is walking, but there's no one in walking distance, then there's the bus, which would be fine if I scheduled things and set them in a planner, but that also feels traping, and so I don't like doing that either, I like being able to call someone, say "Hey, you up for doing something? Cool I'll be right over."

I've been feeling very trapped and enclosed as of late.

The thing about me is, suppose you got this nifty new box, and it's lifesize, and you bring it over and say, "Hey, Have a go, check it out." So I get inside the box and then you trap me in but then say, "Now be careful cause I like this box and I don't want it to get broken." Well the second I feel enclosed I'm going to break the box, I don't like the feeling of being restricted. It kills me. So then I brake your box and you get mad at me, cause you told me you didn't want your box broken and all I had to do was have self discipline, but alas, I've broken your box.

I've looked at a couple of friendships where this specific thing happened, even when I told the person that it was exactly what I wanted, I would sabotage it myself and break out of the box because I didn't like the way it felt. Now this doesn't happen every time, but it does happen often. One way in which I feel trapped is in the hunting game. I'm not a hunter, I don't like hunting people but find that I end up becoming the hunter. When I am put in this mold of the hunter I break out. For instance, something I'll do quite often actually is I'll have this friendship, but it feels like I'm the only one putting forth any effort, so I'll suddenly say, "I'm not going to do anything, I'm going to wait until this person calls me or contacts me before I put forth another contact." I've lost friendships this way because the other person will not put forth any effort, they'll never call me or email me, they just expect me to do everything. Often I'll find out that they think it to be my fault, and maybe in a way it is, because I started out the friendship and almost made them understand that they were only a passenger. But I can't drive all the time. Probably about one fourth of you who are going to be reading this were put under this test, was there a good three month period where you didn't hear anything from me? Well it's probably cause I felt trapped as the hunter and decided I wouldn't talk to you until you put forth some effort.

I often say I'm looking for a needle in a haystack, and that's only partly true, as that needle is going to have to put forth some effort too.

There are of course exceptions to all these, those that are in relationships or getting married get one of those free pass cards where they can disappear for however much they want. Also the "guys", they're exempt from all these rules. Even when they're busy or I am, we can get together after not seeing each other for 3 months and things haven't changed, people often ask how we're all such good friends and it's mostly because that's our understanding. Oh yeah, and in the ever so critical first couple years, we didn't allow girls to interfere.

I'm going to go on a road trip next week, I'm not sure where yet, but it's just going to be me, I'm going to drive somewhere, spend the night then drive back, all by myself, to get away for a tiny bit and explore something new. Anyways, I just made a whole jumblaya full of thoughts, and it feels good to get them out as always. In conclusion, I really want my car back, and I never want to let go of a car ever again.

Saturday, December 16, 2006

The Mustache

It always confuses me when blogger can't seem to upload a 9 kb picture. Anyways, The Mustache is now available to watch at, it's a movie we recently made. It was debuted at a cool film festival in Salt Lake City, while I was up there I really wanted to stay but knew obviously I had to go home. What i mean is I really want to move, I like change, and I want out of Utah Valley but unfortunatly have to be here for another year and a half at least. I feel almost constricted by staying here, though I love school right now I just wish it could be somewhere else. I think I'm going to try and spend more time up in SLC, it might get help me subside these feelings. I'm excited for Sundance to start up, my radio teacher is making a rubrick of all the movies to see and all the ones he'll be going to, so I'll probably end up seeing a bunch this year. I really want to rub elbows with more film makers in the area. Anyways, go check out The Mustache and let us know what you think. I am excited for the christmas break, I'm also curious to see my grades... :)

I just decided as I was doing my music review blog that I now really like the beta because I don't have to republish the blog when changing something in the html. Now I can update links quickly. :)

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

I made the switch

It took me a while but I finally just now made the switch from blogger to blogoogler. The biggest reason was that blogger seemed to put all it's emphasis into the google beta that they wouldn't fix any problems that arose with plain old blogger. I suddenly wasn't able to sign into my blogger account because I had my gmail open, I couldn't switch because I have a thirdmango account on gmail as well, even when I was only signed in as thirdmango in blogger it would require me on some blogs to log in with my google account. It just started getting ridiculous. So I was basically forced to move to keep blogger with any sort of sanity involved.

So I haven't updated as expected in the past two weeks mainly due to finals and what not, I only have one more final which is a take home and doesn't actually need to be sent until next week. I won't wait that long of course, but I will wait until i feel better. I hit a mini second run of the flu that's been going around on just about the worst day it could happen, the first day of finals. Luckily I was still able to get through it all without a hitch. The 4.0 may still happen though it's looking more like my best semester will end up as a 3.9 or a 3.8, but still that's pretty damn good. I am excited for next semester, I have most of my classes scheduled and I'm trying to see if I can still do rugby as well but I'm not sure. Once I have my official schedule I'll post it. Oh and my radio show is done, check in the next couple days for info on that.

I had the best chicken noodle soup of my life today, i got it from the Noodle Company in Orem, it was either the fact that I had been sick for two days and that was the only thing I was willing to eat, or perhaps it really was the best chicken noodle soup I've ever had, only another time at the wonderful eatery will decide that question.

My mind has been so clutered with school work the past two weeks that I haven't had sentient thought that could even be labled on this here blog, so hopefully as my brain comes back to me will I be more frequent. Heh.

Friday, December 01, 2006


I met the girl of my dreams the other night, unfortunatly I met her in my dreams. I've actually been having really cool dreams the past couple nights after having bad ones from being sick, I guess I was just due for some good ones. The best of which was the one where I met the girl of my dreams. She was perfect for me, and it was really weird because it was very clear and precise. I still remember exactly what she looks like, and she doesn't look like one of my friends now so it's not like I was putting on of them in place. She's short, spunky, with very short blond spikey hair. There were a bunch of details as well such as she was an art major, really liked Poker and was in the process of deciding which grad school to go to.

The thing is, I have very vivid dreams, even when they don't make any sense, my mind tricks me into thinking the dreams are real life. One of the other cool dreams I had was I was helping some pirates to rebuild their pirate ship, and all during it I thought it was real life, I have no concept of being in a dream while dreaming. So when I wake up it takes me a couple of seconds to realize I'm back in the real world. I was really bummed when I woke up and found out that girl was just a dream. Funny thing is I've had subsequent dreams with the same girl in it the past couple of nights including one where I ran into her, she said she recognized me, and then said, "You know this is going to sound weird but," and I interupted her by saying, "You dreamt about me the other night." She looked shocked and asked how I knew. Weird. I used to write down my dreams as my dreams always come out so interesting, maybe I oughta start that up again.

So with this dreams girl's face burned into my mind, I wonder if I will run into someone that looks like her. That would be a trip.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

The Day I Never Ate

I find it interesting how I have all opposite problematic situations as everyone else. For instance people will say, "I only got 4 hours of sleep and then I did non-stop school for 20 hours." Where as I will say "I got 13 hours of sleep and missed my classes." Well here's a new one, and it's not really a problem but I know people will read it and say, "What? How can that even happen? But remember, I'm a weirdo.

So I forgot to eat yesterday. I just forgot about it. I got sick on sunday so I didn't want to eat much but I did eat some salad. So on monday I had some more salad and a sandwich or two. Well I wake up Tuesday and I just go through the day, and I forget to eat, and I never get around to it, it's not long it was ever on my mind, it just never came up, until I went to bed. I woke up this morning and realized I hadn't consumed anything for about 24 hours. I think I had some of my water bottles and I know I took my medicine, but I didn't eat any food all day Tuesday. Funny thing is I wasn't really hungry, this morning I woke up and I wanted to fall back asleep but I couldn't because my stomach wouldn't allow it, not the hungry moans but more of a, "Hey, food is what you need to live, and if you ever want to sleep again, you'll put some food in your stomach."

So I watch tv shows to go to bed, and whatever tv show I'm watching becomes parts of my dreams. Because of this I've started ranking television shows based solely on sleepablility. Certain shows produce really good dreams and certain shows make really bad dreams. And it is a much different scale then actually watchability. The top five shows currently for dreamability are

5. The Critic
4. Mr. Show
3. Coupling
2. South Park
1. The Adventures of Pete and Pete

But then on the flip side the top five worst television shows to go to bed to

5. The Tick
4. Boston Legal
3. Dragonball
2. Smallville
1. Scrubs

I like Scrubs, but I doubt I'll go to bed with it ever again.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Google/Blogger Beta help

So I am curious, and usually I just expect BAWB to answer my technical questions about this stuff, but I'll put it out there for everyone. So because of this new blogger beta google merger, when I'm going through my google reader, I'll read a blog post that I want to comment on and find that it's one of these google/beta comments section, when it is, I can't post a comment under Thirdmango without having to switch to a different account because it automatically puts my google account on top, but when I switch to a different account to sign in as Thirdmango, it signs me out of my google reader because it apparently signed me out of all google whatnots. Is there anyway to prevent this from happening? I can always just wait until I'm done, remember which ones I wanted to comment on, but that gets rid of my abilities to do things quicker. I'm not quite ready to move over to this blogger beta yet cause I like having both my google and my blogger accounts active at the same time seperatly. Any thoughts? Or maybe articles on similar problems?

In other news, I think everyone should give this a try. It's a game called Kingdom Of Loathing, I've told a couple of people about it and told them to check it out, just go to and give it a try. If you do stick with it let me know.

One other story, I meant to go to church this morning and so I had set my alarm on my phone as I usually do. My phone has a nifty little thing on the side that you can press when the phone is ringing to make it stop ringing. Well I remember hearing my alarm for about a second but I don't remember anything past that and then at about 11:30, three hours after I was going to wake up, I awoke to find myself tightly gripping onto my phone. My mind must have really wanted to go back to sleep so I grabbed the phone and turned off the ringer going back to sleep with phone still in hand. Sometimes I just can't control that hand of mine.

Friday, November 17, 2006

Thirdmango The Blogger

A comment was posted by the illustrious Th. asking me why I need so many blogs. So I will give an explanation.

This is the original, and is the obvious hub of everything Thirdmango.

I created the music review blog because I wanted a seperate place for the reviews so this blog wouldn't be cluttered with them.

The poker site was created because this one was getting too cluttered with poker stuff, and some people mentioned they didn't really care about my poker exploits, however it hasn't been updated due to Bush signing a bill which now prevents me from playing poker online.

If you go to my profile I'm sure you'll find another blog entitled notes, not having a laptop and having all my classes being computer classes, I needed somewhere quick to put notes.

Needing to document my radio stuff and needing a place to recieve comments on it and not wanting to do all that through writing and resending emails, once again, a blog seemed like the best place to do it.

Then I have my novel on it's own blog, because people had requested to read it, however the blog will soon be deleted as the story will be transfered to the official Magical Science Website at

So there you have it, three main ones. This one, the music review and the radio. The radio is more so for those whom will be listening to my radio program. I'll keep notes for notes obviously, until I get my own laptop, and then the poker one will stay up but don't expect anything from it for a long time. So there you have it. I'm a chronic multi tasker, as I write this I'm also watching an episode of star trek. That's just how I work.

Thursday, November 16, 2006


I'm well on my way to getting my first 4.0 this semester. It's actually becoming a very real possibility. I'm pretty excited. S don't expect much from me for a little bit, I'm making sure school is my first priority. Though this may not get any updates, check out for my radio exploits and what's going on with my first radio show. :)

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Ho Ho Ho

Thanks for the comments to the last post, they were all good advice, though the funny thing is, everyone seems to have missed the point, I know I didn't give one, but both of those circumstances were harmless hypothetical situations, and were from what I thought good representations of the actual point but I can see now should have been less vague. So for another example which ties in to the other other two.

Suppose you're a hunter, and you shoot both deer and pigeons. And you know of two stores, one of which will pay for dead pigeons the other for deer hides. They both pay the same amount, they're both the same distance away but you just can't make it to both stores in the same day. Do you give up the deer to sell the pigeons or do you give up the pigeons to sell the deer. You want to get both done because you really like shooting both pigeons and deer and neither one of them are a bad choice for this made up hypothetical world. So you decide you want to get both done and you're not willing to sacrifice one to gain the other. You need to do both. What do you do?

More to the point I was trying to get at, I used actual events that were possible to make it more realistic for people to imagine, but alas sent across the wrong messages. So don't worry everyone, it's not a big deal, basically it's like saying I want have my kayak and heat it too. :)

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Current Obsession Song

The Mars Volta -- Day Of The Baphomets

I've literally been listening to this song on repeat. All 11 minutes 56 seconds of it.


Imagine if you will that you are both a democrat and a republican. You agree with most of what both parties believe in. So then you decide you want to find someone, you're looking around and all you can find are democrats and republicans. But yet you want to find someone who believes the same as you, both democrat and republican, they must be out there somewhere right? You keep looking and everyone you talk to has the same sort of response, "Oh yeah, I love republican what nots but I can't understand this democrat side." Or the other way around.

Now you're all sitting there thinking, what the heck? Of course not Thirdmango, that can't actually happen, and besides most of us know you're pretty democrat and not republican. Ah but that's not what I was talking about. Let's try something else.

Imagine if you will that you are a video game designer and you go to church one day and some guy gives a talk on the evils of video gaming, that it's a complete waste of time and anyone that does it is ruining their life. But suppose you decided that he was right, what would you do then? Quit your job and lose all your money? Now let's go back, suppose you believe in this church, but yet you really enjoy your job but what everyone seems to be saying you're living the life of a hypoctire, yet you know that you're not. But you still value the opinions of others. What would you do?

Now sure, this also isn't me, and now you're wondering what I'm getting at. But this one is closer to something that has actually happened to me. Sort of. But they're both related scenarios to my life. Know what it is? Don't? Then keep trying to figure it out cause that's all I'm saying on the subject for now.

Friday, November 03, 2006

Post #200, Mango-Svithe

Relgious content ahead, proceed at your own risk.


I had an interesting past couple of days. Very weird and surreal, and almost dream like at this point, it went past and it was just about one of the weirdest weeks of my life. For how good of a weekend I had last weekend this one is looking to be an awful one. Most of my comments on this one will be coming from some Book of Mormon chapters I read this morning. Alma 60-62. This is among the war chapters in the Book of Mormon and in this part Moroni got really angry at Pahoran, another general in the army, he felt Pahoran was being an awful general, he didn't care about the war and all that, so Moroni decided to chew him out by sending him a note. And here's a snippet of what he said.

Verse 1-2, "...Behold, I direct mine epistle to Pahoran, in the city of Zarahemla, who is the chief judge and the governor over the land, and also to all those who have been chosen by this people to govern and manage the affairs of this war.
For behold, I have somewhat to say unto them by the way of condemnation; for behold, ye yourselves know that ye have been appointed to gather together men, and arm them with swords, and with cimeters, and all manner of weapons of war of every kind, and send forth against the Lamanites, in whatsoever parts they should come into our land..." and then in verses 5-9
"...But behold, great has been the slaughter among our people; yea, thousands have fallen by the sword, while it might have otherwise been if ye had rendered unto our armies sufficient strength and succor for them. Yea, great has been your neglect towards us.
And now behold, we desire to know the cause of this exceedingly great neglect; yea, we desire to know the cause of your thoughtless state.
Can you think to sit upon your thrones in a state of thoughtless astupor, while your enemies are spreading the work of death around you? Yea, while they are murdering thousands of your brethren—
Yea, even they who have looked up to you for protection, yea, have placed you in a situation that ye might have succored them, yea, ye might have sent armies unto them, to have strengthened them, and have saved thousands of them from falling by the sword.
But behold, this is not all—ye have withheld your provisions from them, insomuch that many have fought and bled out their lives because of their great desires which they had for the welfare of this people; yea, and this they have done when they were about to aperish with hunger, because of your exceedingly great neglect towards them."

Now imagine yourself in Pahoran's shoes for a moment, and I'm sure all of us can. Think to a time when you've recieved an email or letter and you were wrongly accused, or someone spoke ill of your name. It hurts, it stings. It doesn't feel good.

Moroni was so bold in his letter that even near the end in verse 33 he said.

"Ye know that ye do transgress the laws of God, and ye do know that ye do trample them under your feet. Behold, the Lord saith unto me: If those whom ye have appointed your governors do not repent of their sins and ainiquities, ye shall bgo up to battle against them."

Ouch, not only to have your actions called into question but also your whole soul, everything you hold dear. It couldn't have felt good. I know if I were put in this position and I can think of one time when I had been, when one missionary as I was also a missionary completely questioned and denied that I had any sort of testimony of the church. It hurt bad that someone so close could say something so vile.

Pahoran then did something that in that situation I don't know if I could have done. He immidiatly sent a reply to Moroni and in chapter 61 he started with verse 1 and 2. "Behold, now it came to pass that soon after Moroni had sent his epistle unto the chief governor, he received an epistle from Pahoran, the chief governor. And these are the words which he received:
I, Pahoran, who am the chief governor of this land, do send these words unto Moroni, the chief captain over the army. Behold, I say unto you, Moroni, that I do not joy in your great aafflictions, yea, it grieves my soul." Then onto verse 9 and 10, "And now, in your epistle you have censured me, but it mattereth not; I am not angry, but do rejoice in the greatness of your heart. I, Pahoran, do not seek for power, save only to retain my judgment-seat that I may preserve the rights and the liberty of my people. My soul standeth fast in that liberty in the which God hath made us free. And now, behold, we will resist wickedness even unto bloodshed..." He shortly there after closed his epistle but not before telling Moroni that his group had been sent to and fro and that they did still believe in the cause, they had just ran into problems, but many of those problems had now been dealt with.

Pahoran recieved an awful nasty letter and was able to move forward from it and turn it into a positive, one of my wishes is that when we go through our skirmishes with each other that when misunderstandings arise, that we can try to get beyond it.

So then on to the rest in chapter 62 verses one and two, "And now it came to pass that when Moroni had received this epistle his heart did take courage, and was filled with exceedingly great joy because of the faithfulness of Pahoran, that he was not also a traitor to the freedom and cause of his country.
But he did also mourn exceedingly because of the iniquity of those who had driven Pahoran from the judgment-seat, yea, in fine because of those who had rebelled against their country and also their God."

They were able to reconcile and go onto a better cause. I was thinking today of how many times we have misunderstandings which become big things. Once on my mission when dealing with the elder I mentioned earlier whom was my zone leader at the time, one of my best friends sent me a letter, I was very angry with leadership as a whole at the time and couldn't believe that someone so mean could become a zone leader. Well I open the letter and find that my really good friend has become a zone leader in his own mission. Still venting on this rage at this zone leader I channel all my frustrations in a letter to my friend, basically lambasting him for sucking up and become a stupid zone leader. I tore into him good, and I sent it, he was not happy to recieve it but luckily we were able to work things out, though slowly because it took nearly 3 months for a letter to get back and forth between us. Luckily when we were able to get back together in person, things smoothed over and things were able to be explained. How many times do we get hot headed ourselves when something rubs us the wrong way. Just look at the BYU editorial section, something rubs someone the wrong way, they get hot headed and write a scathing letter. That's how we are.

So this morning I took Moroni's place, I felt I had been wronged and I was hurt by it, so I sent a scathing email to this person displaying my displeasure in feeling wronged. Unfortunatly also like Moroni, my information was incorrect and so I was wrong in the first place. But the deed had been done and a giant misunderstanding had occured. I won't go into any more specifics as it's still fresh on my mind, but this story was one of the first things that popped into my head. Now honestly, I really hope the other person involved does not see this for a while, since time is often what is needed at most. But I wrote this more so for myself then anyone else, so that I could get my thoughts out onto a canvas.

So then to the questions, how do you suppose you would act in Moroni's place? How about in Pahoran's place. Suppose the same sort of scenario happens but in your life, what would we do in these circumstances? And a follow up to that one, would we be justified in doing so? Thoughts? Comments?

This has been the official second Mango-Svithe.

Saturday, October 28, 2006

Post #199

I've been so behind on my blog reading it's been crazy. I went onto my google reader today and found I have somewhere around 150 blogs that I haven't read. I think I've over exerted myself on the bloggings, so if you haven't seen me give you a comment in a while it's cause I'm lame and haven't gotten around to it. I've skimmed over most, but haven't gotten into it as much. So with my 200th post looming I'm trying to figure out what to do for a celebration. I've also been lacking on actually blogging, as I have been also on my music one just because I've been up to a whole lot of different things as of late. But I have gotten back up to date with the music site. I actually tired to make a post on here about a week ago but it didn't work for some reason.

So with the death of internet poker I find myself considerably lacking. I have one week left before the site that I go to says no more to US players, since the bill was signed I still have been able to make 30 bucks which brings me up to 100 total. But after monday it will have to be poker nights which I just can't seem to get enough people to say yes for. But then, I would take it more seriously then everyone else because I enjoy the game so much. So with poker out my computer time will cut down considerebly, I often do my homework and/or music reviews while playing poker but with poker gone I'll finish my homework and have more time to do other things. Maybe I will work out more, I haven't really made it known but I've been working out at 24 hour fitness, I get anywhere between 8-16 hours in a week. I'm losing about 2 pounds a week which is good enough for me, slow and steady will be better for my body then anything else. If anyone has any suggestions let me know.

So in less coherent thoughts of which no one will really understand but I'm going to say anyways.

1. It turns out that the shooting stars really were just a coincidence.

2. That fountain is doing an awful job.

So here's a question which was actually posed a couple of months ago, you know how you flip a coin into a fountain and you can make a wish, can you give that wish a time limit? Or is that against the rules? I gave it a time limit because I felt my wish would have been really lame had I not. But then in telling the others that were with me when doing so they said I wasn't allowed to do that, that wishes can't be given time limits. Discuss. Go.

I'm really proud of the fact that the last post got 40 comments, I never thought that to be possible. Good work everyone.

So this past weekened I went with a friend to the Utah Grizzlies Hockey game. My radio teacher actually hooked me up with 8 dollar tickets that he was able to get through a one time only employee what not. So, there were about 5 others from my radio class also there, each with a friend and my radio teacher as well. During the game we kept making funny comments and overall just had an enjoyable time. Well at the end of the game when my Radio Teacher (The Wiz) got up to leave a guy from behind him stopped him and said that him and his group was really funny and that his own group really enjoyed us. He asked who we were and The Wiz said we were from the radio group at UVSC, so the man then said, "You know, I'd really like you guys to come to more games, he then revealed he was the company's Vice President and extended an offer to the Wiz that if we wanted, any wednesday game we could get really good 8 dollar tickets. So nwo I want to go more often, so if someone out there really wants to see Hockey and wants to go on a wednesday night, let me know and you can come with me and we'll watch Hockey.

Monday, October 09, 2006


I had an interesting night on Saturday Night. I went to my friend Thelma's apartment where they were having an apple party, it was a lot of fun, but afterwards the plan was to go driving up Sundance Canyon and get to a plateau where we would have a bonfire, and hit some drums and have a Pagan festival with the full moon. We got up there about half past midnight, set up the bonfire, got out the drums and started rocking, people were dancing and it was awesome. The plan was also to go find a spot in nature and relax and commune with nature. I had sometime to think as I lay in the grass next to a solitary tree, way up high where the air was very clean and pure.

I thought about my life right now, and how I've got direction. It's amazing to have direction, I actually know what I want to do with my life, I have a list of things I want to do and I'm well on my way to fulfilling those dreams. But not only do I know what to do, I know exactly how to go about accomplishing them, I have the path laid out before me. Not only that but I'm able to do each thing and enjoy doing it. I have fun just about every day and enjoy just about everything I do.

But yet with all of this, there was a black spot right in the middle. Have you ever looked and saw your whole life but also saw the middle being blocked off by a dark spot? Well that's what it was. It was that of companionship, and I couldn't see it. It's like I have every piece together in this puzzle and yet three pieces are missing and I can't quite make out what the puzzle picture is because those three peices have the vital parts. I know I've said this type of thing before but it's still nagging at me, just the fact that everything seems to fall into place and yet the one thing I want the most isn't even close to coming together. Now don't get me wrong, it's not like I want to immidiatly get married to anyone, I just want to be able to have some relationships, but even those are so far from reach that it seems I'll never get to them. I feel like I'm just stuck behind a roadblock, for a variety of reasons.

I don't give good first impressions. You know how much I truely hate the first impression? Some have suggested that I just cut my hair, but if you think about it, I haven't had this hair all that long, most of the time I have had short hair, and it wasn't any different, in fact it was even harder to find dates when I didn't have hair, I'm much more goofy looking without hair. Besides, the people that don't like my hair now I wouldn't be attracted to anyways most of the time.

I feel like I've come to the point where I sabotage myself. I've gotten to the point where I just don't ever succeed. So because of this, I find someone whom I know would work well with me, and I know that I would work well for them, so I don't want to have to wait a couple of days in between interactions, I want to go a little more quickly, but it just doesn't work that way, but yet if I do go slowly, I lose interest and feel like it's over even before it's started so I just give up. Thus sabotaging myself.

I'm not a leader. I never have been, and I've come to accept that, I don't want to be a leader, I do much better in helping others then in being the one to start or initiate things. Thus for me to have to be the leader in the dating world just doesn't feel right, it feels abnormal, but it's such a stigma that the guy has to be the instigator. Even I've found among girls that say they don't believe in that and yet I watch their relationships and they wait for the guy to initiate things. I found one girl that was willing to be the intiate and we worked well for the short time we had, but timing was off for us and she got married while I was off on a mission.

I'm not the ideal. There are too many things about me that just aren't the ideal. Besides the fact that I know exactly what I want to do, I want to be an artist, I'm a democrat, I'm a Mormon and I live in Utah. I don't like the excuse of living in Utah, but those that know me, you can tell, I don't belong in Utah, I'm just stuck here. I'm sure even this problem could be fixed if I were to move out of state.

I don't know, it's really frustrating that though all these things are working out, the one thing I've wanted forever doesn't seem to ever be able to happen. I wish I could be happy with my life without a relationship, unfortunatly I know myself too well, and I just won't be happy without someone else to share things with and for them to share things with me. I can have the most fun in the world I can think of and it just doesn't seem to compare to having someone I know that loves me. And that I love them. Whatever am I going to do?

So there I was, and I came home and have enjoyed my time since, but yet I would even trade all the good for just the relationship stuff. One of my biggest things that I've been taught over and over and over and over again, is patience. I've been patient for so long with so many things, but I think I'm too my breaking point, I feel like I can't go longer, I can't wait another year, I just don't want to. But alas, if that's how It has to be then I guess I'll just have to deal with it, just know if you find exploded bits of me, then that's the reason why.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

what is one of the most annoying things you can think of?

well here's mine, i accidently dropped some water on my keyboard, and it shorted out two of the keys so they don't work any more, the left shift key, the one i use to shift, and the tab key. augh, this is wicked annoying.

Well luckily i have another keyboard which I'm not using however it doesn't have all the same buttons. Anyone know how much it would cost to get those two keys repaired?

Monday, October 02, 2006

Two New

I've decided since I like to be organized sort of, I've made two more blogs for very specific purposes.

First for any poker related stuff, all of that will go here.

So if you don't care about the poker stuff, then you don't have to see it any more. I did win 22 bucks today, so it'll be updated regularly.

The other blog is for my novel and any other writings I decide to post, it's my writings blog.

So just enter those into your feeds if you want and there ya have it. Bigger post to come sometime tomorrow.

Saturday, September 30, 2006

The Early Bird Gets The Worm

So this week due to my last week falling asleep much too late, I had a drastic schedule change (which I do often) and am now waking up early. I mean really early. The past couple of nights I've fallen asleep around 9 pm and woken up around 5 am. Now my biggest problem with this is, I have nothing until 2 pm. Nothing. This whole "The Early Bird Gets The Worm" thing. I don't really understand it. I don't know what to do with my time in the mornings. At least when I have a late schedule I know what to do, wake up, go to class, have fun with friends, come home, do homework go to sleep. But with waking up so early, it becomes do homework, finish homework, do stuff on the internet, wonder, ponder, think, look on the internet again, read something, think, look at the clock, go look for something to do, can't find anything to do, just an hour more before class, get ready, go to class, come home want to play with friends but really blasted tired, fall asleep. Not working out for me. I've thought about getting a gym pass, but that only gets rid of two hours in the morning. What I want to do is substitute the friends part in the morning. At least when Freda was around I knew I could go have fun with her in the mornings, but who else is up and willing to do fun things in the mornings? If you're there, let me know, I wanna go have some fun, and it's 7:30 am. Augh. I would go Yard Saleing, however being as how it's conference weekend, I doubt there will be many yard sales out. But, if it does end up getting too boring, I may end up trying anyways.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

This Morning

As an addition to my homeworkin' yesterday, this is what I did this morning.

I read a couple of chapters in my radio book.


I read a couple of chapters in my 3D animation book


playing a poker tournament and winning 7 bucks.

So I made 7 dollars while doing my homework. :)

That's 27 bucks this week.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006


So today was my do a lot of homework day. Guess what I had to do for homework.

1. Read about 10 chapters in the 3D studio max book on how to make 3D graphics

2. Read about 5 chapters on the history of Radio and how Radio works.

3. Watch the movie "Paths of Glory" by Stanley Kubrick

4. Create an old time radio show and put it together

5. Go out to the mountains and take a whole bunch of cool landscape shots. (I found some really surprisingly vibrant colors in the mountains that I didn't expect to find since this is Utah and there isn't supposed to be that kind of color.)

Yeah, that's what I did today. I sure do love my classes, for me to watch a cool movie, make a radio show and drive up into the mountains all in one day, that's pretty sweet.

I didn't have enough time today to go exactly where I wanted to go in the mountains, I wanted to go up Hobble Creek Canyon, but didn't have that kind of time. Maybe later this weekend when I have less other homework to do. :)

Tuesday, September 26, 2006



The thing about apples is I like them, in fact I really like them. I just never end up eating them. You would think that if I liked apples then I'd eat them, but it isn't that simple. The biggest problem is that apples don't have legs. If apples had legs, then they could walk right up to my apartment, knock on my door and there would be a good apple, ready to eat. No, I have to go out and buy one. Now I'm not entirely apposed to buying apples, it's just that I have to take time out of my day to go and buy these apples. Then in that time my life is dedicated to going out and buying apples, and my whole day becomes screwy. When I want a delicious apple, I tend to forget that I need to eat other things, like Vegatables, and grains and drink water. That's the trouble, I love all that other stuff, the other stuff makes my life very good. The problem that occurs most of all however, is that I'll get to the store, find an apple that is quite good and find that it's not for sale, or it's rotten from the inside, or it's not for sale, or a friend has thrown it around before I got there and I can't eat it cause it's all germy. Because of all these factors I have never and probably will never eat a good ripe apple.

I'm never myself when around apples.

Now don't get me started on the stems...

Monday, September 25, 2006

BAM cont.

So you can only see it if you log in....

1 Thirdmango Real $20.00
2 philzuk30 Real $15.00
3 dusted_pdx Real $10.00
4 HarvellRico1 Real $7.00
5 Daydragon Real $7.00
6 RAGE RULES Real $5.00
7 llbcolo Real $5.00
8 Monettes Real $3.00
9 dirtbags99 Real $3.00
10 Ringo570 Real $3.00

The tournament was free to enter, it started with 1000 people and only the top ten get paid real money. I got first, 20 bucks for me, and all the while I did the following -- Had a conversation with my roommates, did homework, wrote a music review, and played Kingdom of Loathing, all the while winning 20 bucks. I'm pretty pleased with myself. So now I'm gonna go buy something with that 20 bucks. Woo!

Sunday, September 24, 2006


Click here to find out why I'm very happy tonight.

I think I can retire.

I'm gonna buy me a new cd monday morning! None of it will go to betting, all of it will go to a new cd, which one should I get?

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

List Time

I've been thinking lately and I thought about doing a list.

Things I want to do at some point in my life in no particular order.

I want to...

Follow any one golfer on a PGA tour event.

Finish a novel

Make an album

Play in 3 World Series of Poker events including the Main Event

Buy my own bowling ball with bag and have them custom fit to my fingers

Join a bowling league

Get golfing lessons

Paticipate in one golf tournament

Play at a frisbee golf course

Attend a Conan O'Brien taping

Go to all 50 states (Only 13 left)

Go to New Zealand

Attended a Mars Volta concert

throw the first pitch at a Boston Red Sox Game

Go to the Super Bowl

Go to Wrestlemania

Spend the night at a bus stop

Make a webcomic

Go to Bonaroo

Go to an anime, star trek, science fiction and comic book convention

Get a picture of myself in front of each of the 50 states signs

Meet William Shatner

Go to the academy awards

Watch Avenue Q on broadway

Go to an X Games

Play Polo

That's all for now, thoughts?

Saturday, September 16, 2006

A Regular

I really like being a regular. You know when you go into a deli and the guy behind the desk sees you and says, "Hey, you want your usual?" That is one of the most beautiful lines in the english launguage for me. Not the fact that I go to the place all too often, but that the guy behind the desk whom I don't know has taken the time to remember what my favorite sandwich is. The most recent time that happened was when I was having an IHOP addiction, I came in one day and the guy whom had served me before said, "Hey, you want your usual?" I replied in the affirmative and he indeed did bring out my philly cheese steak with mashed potatoes minus the pickle spear and a dr. pepper. I was impressed. In the same way, I want to be able to get to know the person behind the counter, so that I can come in say, "Hey Jimmy!" "Hey Mr. F, you want your usual?" "You know it Jimmy."

There's a deli in Haverhill Massachusets that I got to this point, it was a really good deli and I knew the guy behind the ocunter from coming in, plus he was running for some sort of political office, so he was extra friendly.

Anyways, I don't really know why I thought about writing about this, I just thought I would, and I really thought I had more... Guess not.

Lazy Day Saturdays

The one problem with having three day weekends is you've got all your homework done by friday night, so then saturday comes around, and everyone you know is either at work or doing homework. Sometimes I'm a little over anxious to do things, it drives me crazy when I am. I'm really good with patience but when you've been patient for a long period of time you tend to get anxious. I'm feeling very anxious today which is why just being able to have a lazy day isn't very appealing to me right now. Hopefully I'll be able to find something fun to do, cause being inside is going to kill me.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Rafting at UVSC

Yesterday Morning I was helping out the UVSC radio station club by being out for their booth, during the club week what not. For those that don't know much about the layout of UVSC, the entire campus is interlocked. You can get from one class to another all while staying inside, sometimes it may not be the fastest way but it is pretty cool. Well in the middle of campus is an open area that is a courtyard with a cool pool of water. Well the outdoors club had an inflatable raft out there. You can see me barely, I'm in the grey, I have samurai hair. My radio teacher is in the back. We're rafting around.

So here we are closer to the end of our trip and we're teetering. I'm a little bit of a big fella, not overly big, due to how tall I am, being 6 foot four. As a side note I've been dieting over the past couple months, about 20-30 more pounds and I'll be to my ideal weight, I give myself about 6 months and it'll happen. Yay. You can't really see the bun in my hair, but it is there, when I comb that bad boy out it gets humongous. But back to the story, we started teetering and losing out balance until...

Just One More Post...

Until picture time, can you feel the excitement?

So I've decided I'd like to start emailing. E-Mail has always been something that just sort of alluded me, I've been able to excel in all other forms of the internet and yet the only emails I ever get are from websites updating me on things, I don't actually get true emails from people any more. It pretty much stopped right after the mission because I wasn't on a mission any more. Once I got home I found that I could communicate with people without using email and thus it wasn't needed. However, now that I'm taking a bunch of courses and all but one use computers the whole time, I'm online a lot more, also since most of my homework is computer related, I'm online more often too, and it's not a depressing thing or anything like that as I find I still have time to visit friends and talk on the phone and all those funky things, I just want an email or two, especially since I find that apparently everyone else gets at least two a day. Wow, what a crazy world. So I figure since I'm getting so into this whole computer thing, I should start emailing. So tell me how you are, send me an email at and I'll be sure to reply and then everything will be right in the world.

On a side note, for some reason I always liked those 50 question questionare emails, I don't know why but I like them.

Anywho, I'm off to class, then I'm going to watch the Protector tonight and then there's a Firefly tournament going on at my place tomorrow night, if you haven't seen Firefly, you should, everyone is invited that wants to come, just let me know.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006


Tinkered at the links section, made it a little up to date, though not done yet. Also have a cool adventure in picture form coming sometime in the next couple days.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006


I've been really enjoying life as of late. I haven't had a major bout of depression in over 18 months and most everything right now is going really great. Of course, I still want to have a girlfriend, but besides the whole love life thing my life is at the best it's been in years. Classes are just about the best thing right now, Radio is one of the coolest classes, even 3d modeling which is just about one of the hardest classes I've ever taken is awesome just because I'm enjoying the whole program. My writers block of forever is gone, I'm writing about 3 different novels including screenplays as well. They're not quite to where I want them obviously, but just to be able to get the ideas down on paper is awesome. I've been writing music which is awesome, I've been editing movies, I've just been really enjoying life and there have been very few things that have pissed me off, and when they do, I just ignore them and don't go near it. I'm really liking where music in general is at the moment, and overall I'm just finding that there actually is a chance at my graduating and moving to one of the coasts at some point. I really want to live on either the west or east coast near the northern edge. I'm just overall enjoying life right now and I'm finding that I don't think life sucks, cause it doesn't. You know how awesome it is when you're no longer at that point where "life sucks"?

You know what's been the two main things in helping me to this point?

Firstly it's the getting rid of guilt as a motivation. Guilt sucks as a motivation, you feel guilty for doing or not doing something so then you do it better or some such what not, that just sucks. To be able to change my motivation so that I do it because I want to, and if I don't succeed, I don't worry about it, it's not the end of the world.

Secondly is being able to enjoy and not feel bad about doing nothing. Oh man, this one was big, once I could enjoy and not feel bad about doing nothing I was a made man. Sometimes you're just tired of everything and you want to spend an entire day playing some stupid video game and not caring about anything and I just feel so refreshed! And I don't beat myself up because I didn't accomplish anything cause that's just silly, that just makes you need to accomplish and you get into a vicious cycle. Being able to get rid of those bad motivations and being able to control how I feel about things has been an amazing change in my life and has just made everything much more fun. I actually enjoy school because it's not that I need to accomplish things, I just want to, and since it doesn't become a need it doesn't become a stressful thing. And for me stress always seems to be associated with bad.

I'm really enjoying amatuer work, I'm finding that getting into the basics and the raw vessels that people produce, and finding the good in them, makes everything else I read seem more magical. Wow. Things are just sweet.

Now mind you, I'm not without my problems, there are a lot of things currently which if I let them could really get me down, and sure they're still weighty and bogging me down, but really screw that crap. I'll deal with it and not let it bother me, it makes things so much nicer.

Now sometimes it sucks when dealing with actual people, since there are some that are just non stop gloomy, and sure maybe I might make them gloomy with how I act, but you know, maybe I'm just a little selfish or maybe I'm a lot selfish, I don't know. Right now, I'm doing things for me. I'm doing things for others as well, but right now, it's mainly about me. Before, I made it about other people, and what happened? I focused too much on others and failed all my classes and was never happy. So at the moment I feel I need to be selfish, so that I can succeed at something.

Anyways, that's about it. What do you think of those motivations, do you find being selfish no matter what is wrong? I'm interested in hearing your thoughts. Anywho, if you need some optimism, I can give you some. And in exchange you can get me a girlfriend. :)

Monday, September 11, 2006

What things you learn about while being in class

While in class today the teacher talked about This.


Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Are You Completely Insane?

So today in my 3D modeling and animation class (which I'm actually getting to the point where I can do things) this guys sat next to me and started talking about the weirdest things, apparently he had it from a very reliable source that since macs could now start running the windows operating system, that macs no longer needed to make their own operating system and would just stop doing so and make all macs use the windows operating system. There were about four of us sitting there trying to register what he just said until each of us said in our own way, "That doesn't make any sense at all." That's like saying "Well now that our company can just buy this kind of bread, we have no need to sell our own any more, let's just stop making money." This guy however was insistant that he was right, he in the next couple days plans to look it up and find the source so that we can all see how right he is...

Find Your Spot Part Deux

In Honor of Everyone else doing it, and due to the fact that maybe I've changed a little over the past year and a half I decided to take the test again. First what I scored a year and a half ago.

1. Knoxville, Tennesse 687,300
2. Seattle, Washington 3,555,000
3. Cincinnati, Ohio 1,650,000
4. Norfolk, Virginia 1,551,000
5. Carlisle, Pennsylvania 615,000
6. Greenville, South Carolina 56,000
7. Charlotte, North Carolina 1,335,000
8. Charleston, South Carolina 549,000
9. Chattanooga, Tennessee 155,000
10. Long Island, New York 2,780,000
11. Richmond, Virginia 966,500
12. Hickory, North Carolina 342,000
13. Olympia, Washington 207,300
14. Nashville, Tennessee 545,500
15. Kent, Washington 80,000
16. Asheville, North Carolina 70,000
17. Jacksonville, Florida 778,000
18. Johnson City-Kingsport, Tennesse 100,000
19. Tacoma, Washington 194,000
20. Louisville, Kentucky 801,000
21. Chesapeake-Virginia Beach, Virginia 624,000
22. Oklahoma City, Oklahoma 507,000
23. Clarksville, Tennessee 104,000
24. St. Louis, Missouri 2,600,000

Now My list today, it didn't let me do the same format. In paraenthesis is what number it was before if it appears again.

1. Long Island, New York (10)
2. Seattle, Washington (2)
3. Eugene, Oregon
4. Olympia, Washington (13)
5. Corvallis, Oregon
6. Providence, Rhode Island
7. Tacoma, Washington (19)
8. New Haven, Connecticut
9. Kent, Washington (15)
10. Danbury, Connecticut
11. Portland, Oregon
12. New York City, New York
13. Bellingham, Washington
14. Carlisle, Pennsylvania (5)
15. Boston, Massachusetts
16. Salem, Oregon
17. Manchester, New Hampshire
18. Nashua, New Hampshire
19. Worcester, Massachusetts
20. Portland, Maine
21. Medford, Oregon
22. Cape Cod, Massachusetts
23. Hartford, Connecticut
24. Harrisburg, Pennsylvania

I think this time it may be more accurate, last time I had five from Tennesee this time, none. This time I also had cities that I really want to live in such as Boston and Seattle. And cities I love such as Portland Maine and Manchester NH. I also think if Sara still reads this, that she'll be very happy with my number 21.

Monday, September 04, 2006

I'm a wikipedia editor...

I've been neglecting this blog as most of my writing has gone towards my music blog. But i did want to saythat I made my first contribution to wikipedia today. When reviewing Panic! At The Disco's cd, I went to the actual cd site and noticed that the words as and synthesizers were without a space so it said "assynthesizers", so I put in a space and saved it in, so go and check it out, that was me! Woo!

I've been meaning to write a story here about something that happened to me this week, I probably will write about it sometime this week, hopefully, otherwise you'll just have to wonder forever, so sad.

Monday, August 28, 2006

How My Life Changed In One Week

Here's how it was supposed to happen.

In UVSC's film program they have a filtering system which is the first two mutimedia classes, you can't take the second until you've completed the first and you can't take any other film classes until finishing the second. Well winter semester I was able to convince the program to temporaily waive those classes so I could take an editing class. So when this semester rolled around, I could take the two classes that came out of the editing class and the multimedia one class. So I was going to take them as early morning and night classes and keep my graveyard shift job.

Well here's how it did happen.

I went to the mulitmedia one class and the first day I was bored to tears. So i went and talked to my counseler and was able to swing it where she permanently waived those two classes and suddenly i could take more classes, through it all I ended up with 16 credits instead of the 8 I had planned on, now because schooling is much more important then other stuff and because I now had classes from 11 am until 9 pm I couldn't also work a job from midnight to 7 am, so I had to quit my job in the process. So suddenly I don't have a job, I'm taking many more classes then I thought I would and I'm sleeping at night again. Pretty weird eh?

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

I've Never

I've never fallen asleep behind the wheel before. Until that is last night. It was the scariest thing in the world. What happened was I had been on a trip over the weekend where I was required to instantly change my schedule from going to sleep at 7 am to going to sleep at 10 pm, I was able to do it pretty easily, but as it's been the case time and time before changing it to that is easy, getting back on the 7 am schedule is incredibly hard. Well Monday morning I woke up after getting about ten hours of sleep and had to move into my new apartment. I got all the things together and ran it down to my new apartment. I didn't get it all however, so I had to make another trip. The biggest downside to all of this was I wore myself out and still had work that night from midnight to 7 am. I finished bringing all my stuff (I thought) and then went to work. By about 3 am I was dying, I was so tired and I couldn't handle being awake. By four am I gave up and emailed my boss saying I couldn't stay in because I was still trying to get back onto the schedule. I thought, hey luckily this time I live only five minutes away from work, I'll be good to go. I got back to my apartment and found two things I had forgotten about.

Now as I've said before I have a very low tolerance for heat and a high tolerance for the cold. Well when I entered the apartment that night by room was sweltering, I tried just about everything but my room would not cool down, I was finding it so hard to get comfortable and I could not fall asleep even with how tired I was. Well the other problem I had was that I forgot to bring down bed sheets. Now this wouldn't be too much of a problem if I didn't have this weird allergic reaction to certain types of fabrics. For instance, you know in hotels how they have the bed sheets, then they have that brown blanket and then the big blanket. Well that brown blanket causes me to have a slight allergic reaction where if I touch it I have trouble breathing. Well my mattress was made out of some sort of fabric like that and I found I couldn't breathe as I touched it, which meant I really needed bed sheets. So at 5 in the morning I finally decided to drive back to my house about half an hour away and sleep there.

I turned on some loud music that I could sing along to, and I had the ac on full. I tried opening the window but as I have unkempt hair it blew into my face. Well as I was about a minute away from my house I was really losing it, I was trying to do anything to keep myself awake and it was really tough, I was bouncing up and down, hitting myself but my mind kept insisting that it was shut down time. Well as I had just one more corner to go my mind drifted to a thought I had had and for a few seconds I blipped out. I don't remember anything that happened in that couple seconds, the next thing I knew I was in the left lane going about 30 mph heading for a garbage can. Well finally that woke me up. I swerved over and was able to get home safely. By the time my head hit the pillow at home I was asleep. But believe me, after those couple seconds was one of the most startling moments of my life.

So as a procaution, today I brought down my bed sheets and I bought 3 fans for my room, my roommates did want at least one for their room, which I'm okay with, but I insisted on at least two being in my room. Especially since I don't want to go through that again.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006


Last night I got my best yet, I got 4th place in a Texas Holdem tournament. 7 bucks. Woo.

At the rate I'm going, just by playing at work and in leisure time when doing other things I can make about 20 bucks a month. Which isn't anything at all, but it's an extra cd or two. Nice.

Now as a notice to everyone, I will not be online from thursday morning until sunday night as I will be on a road trip to cali. We were able to get rooming arrangements, but thanks to all who offered. :) Then monday I move into my apartment, so don't expect to see much from me from about thursday until monday.

That is all.

Thursday, August 10, 2006


When I first got back from my mission almost two years ago I had decided I wanted to listen to every single one of my cds from start to finish. I also decided I would write down every movie I watched, I got up to about 150 movies before I stopped writing them down. The cds one never really came to fruition, until now. I know I already plugged it in the last post, but if you go to I'm rating cds there and putting on recommendations. Well this is not just for people to get recommendations, it's for me to actually listen to all of my cds and have a record of which ones I had listened to thus far. Then once i get through my extensive collection then I'll just keep buying stuff and put it on there and for me it'll be grand, and maybe eventually, it'll help me with my reviewing skills.

I am wicked excited to be moving into the new apartment, I think it's weird because for the first time, all of my roommates know about my blog. The things I'm looking forward to the most are that I'll only be 5 minutes from work instead of 40, I'll be a short walk from school, It'll be my first college apartment that isn't BYU approved housing. I'm also excited as my film stuffs will be able to take front seat again as school basically facilitates that option.

But before I can move into the apartment we have our road trip out to Arcadia in California for Gary's wedding. That'll be a lot of fun, and hopefully the group will be able to survive road tripping. As a big fan of road tripping, I don't know how the group will survive, but we shall see. In any case, I'm really looking forward to having long conversations with Joey while crossing the desert.

Monday, August 07, 2006

2 Items of Business

So the other night, I'm leaving my house and listening to the radio which I don't usually do as I usually put in my iPod but there was a good song. Well it goes to the break and the dude says, "Eighth caller wins a pair of Death Cab For Cutie tickets," well obviously since I'm writing about this, long story short I won the tickets. So I'm going with a good friend of mine and I'm excited to go.

Secondly, this goes out to Th, JB, and other such Californians that read this here blog, I need to know which city you guys are in, as I will be in Southern California in 2 weekends and may have to ask if I can bum a night on your couch(es). Then also we can hang out or something if you have time. :) Let me know where you guys are if you can, and I'll let you know where I'm going to be, and if it's anywhere close we can say hello.

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

I know I know

So, I know I do this all the time, but I started up another side blog. But unlike the ranting one which I told very few people about since I really didn't do anything on it, I think this one will stick. If not you can always just put it on your RSS feeds. But basically it's for me to rate different albums and give away recommendations. So go check it out, I've already done 5 albums, and basically after I listen to an album I write up a review, and as I have a whole lot of albums I can do this quite easily. Go check it out here Thirdmusic

Monday, July 31, 2006


I had quite the week this week. I saw three movies, which I'll start on now.

Brick - Very intriguing movie. It looks like the real world but it's definatly a made up world. If you want to see a movie that will make you think during the movie then go see this one. The most interesting thing about this movie is how tame it is, there is no swearing, no sex, very little violence but it's a dark movie. It's R rated and I think it should be, because it really doesn't feel like it could pass for PG-13, but if you went based solely on the subjects it would be PG-13. For once I think the MPAA made a very good call on this movie. For that alone if nothing else you should see this movie. If you're fine with R rated movies of course.

A Scanner Darkly - I really didn't like this movie. The animation was really cool, but if you have low blood pressure, be careful as it may make you dizzy as it did me. There were so many scenes which really didn't have any barring on the story and though you could tell what was going on, it didn't really have a point. The part that really just made me feel weird was the fact that the nudity in the movie seemed like the only reason why it was in there was so that the animators could animate breasts. There was really no need for it. Overall very low, and not recommended.

Wordplay - Wow! A documentary about Crossword puzzles which really draws you in and really entertains you. I'm amazed at how good this was. They start off giving you information, but not too much, a good amount, then they give you a story and it really gets into it. I've had a lot of looks from people when I say this is highly recommended but believe me, you will not be dissappointed by this movie. If you've ever enjoyed a crossword puzzle you'll like this movie. Go see it! I have nothing bad to say about this movie.


I went up to Salt Lake City almost every day this week. I drove so much it was crazy. Also we had a good edition of "The Magical Science Club" our weekly writing group. This was my first time not bringing something but as I've spent so much time away from my computer (including work computer as I missed a couple days this week). I'm up to 6 chapters in my book and I'm really happy with it. I went and saw Ween in concert this week, it was really quite good.


I was teaching Gospel Doctrine today and there was this one guy who kept making comments and I was trying to place why I knew him for the longest time and then half way into teaching I suddenly had it, he looked exactly like "Arnie, The Strongest Man in the World" from the show "The Adventures of Pete and Pete".


I got a co-worker for the graveyard shift, cause they wanted someone who could do fiche all night. So it's weird having a second person. It's not too bad though. It's a little more cramped in here.


I was hoping to say something interesting, but couldn't think of anything.

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Mango Svithe

For those that know not what a Svithe is, I would recommend going here Thmazing's Blog. It's basically meaning a religious whatnot, so if you don't like them religious stuffs turn back now. I had been planning on writing one of these for a while but now I actually have a reason. So first off, in case you don't know I'm my singles ward's Gospel Doctrine Teacher. It feels really weird, because my last ward, there's no way they'd ever trust me enough to be in that kind of position, but this ward is a lot different. I fully expected when I went in for the interview for them to say something about my hair, but to my shock they asked me to be the Gospel Doctrine Teacher. This along with this other girl in the ward.

So onto my lesson, I started it off with something constant but through in a twist. I asked if anyone had read, one hand rose and I said, "Good, I was hoping none of you read so this will be as new to you as it was to me."

What we talked about was the Prophet Elijah in the new Testaments, specifically 1 Kings 17-18. The first story was about Elijah coming to the woman who was ready to die, the thoughts that came out of that one were how when you're in trouble in some way someone will come around and will be able to save you, you just have to be willing to become friends with them or what not. You never know who has gone through the same thing you have and can help. Also that even when prayers are answered it doesn't mean it's time to relax because you'll never know what could come up.

But overall I really liked the story in chapter 18. Elijah basically calls out Ahab and says "Your church is false. So bring all your priests to the mountain." So they do and Elijah gets up in verse 20 and basically says to all of the masses there, "Either choose Baal as God, or The Lord as God, stop sitting on the fence and make a decision." The people just sorta looked at him so they had a competition, he told the priests to build and alter and he would too, and they would call upon each God and whichever one was God would light a fire. So the 450 priests all got up and cut their bodies and tried to call upon their God, and could not. Then Elijah got up and called upon God and long story short God lit the fire. Pretty cool sign there. The interesting thing that was brought up though is we got into a discussion of how testimonies sometimes come through big signs but to keep them the small things need to happen. In Kings 19 Elijah is reminded of the still small voice, we couldn't get that far though which is too bad.

Anyways, I gotta go now so more to come later maybe. I do have the entire ward for the next three weeks. :)


I know nobody cares, but I won 5th place in an Omaha (Poker) Tournament out of 2000 people and won 7 bucks.

Monday, July 17, 2006

Sleeping is Overrated

I've found that I've never ever been able to sleep normally. I just can't sleep like normal people. My problems with sleeping come in wide varieties and they are always looked upon by others with shock and awe. I remember people in high school telling me they usually got about four hours of sleep a night. I have never been able to do that. When I wake up after four hours my body does this weird thing where it takes control of my mind and tells the Brain, "I am still tired, and I will go back to sleep, and if you don't agree with me, well you can just deal with it, cause I'm in control of this ship and there's nothing you can do about it." So back to sleep I go, even if there's some place I need to be. See my problem is I always get too much sleep. Now when I tell people this they wish they could do what I do, but to that I reply "NO! You do not! Believe me, it's not awesome!" My freshman year of college I averaged about 15-17 hours of sleep a night. My body will literally go into a comatose (comatoast? (Yes!)) state. Unless I have an alarm to wake me, and sometimes even then I'll stay asleep for that long. My longest time without being sick was 22 hours. Now maybe if it was a problem where I overslept and got 10 hours, then it would be fine, but this is 3/4ths of a day.

Luckily though, I don't really have to deal with that as much any more. Now since I have so much to do, I will get about 8 hours of sleep except on occasion where I end up getting around 12, which was the case on saturday. Last night, I tried to get only 5 hours of sleep, because I wanted to wake up to go to Literary Society (Sorry guys, I just can't remember what the official title is), but I could not wake up and missed it to get my body's required 8 hours of sleep.

If this was not bad enough, I have incredibly vivid dreams, I can remember each of my dreams after waking from them. Even coming to the point where my dreams will wake my up and I'll be very disoriented. Now believe me when I say I have very weird dreams. They never make any sense, yet are incredibly vivid.

Now it really isn't all that bad and I do like complaining. But really I just wish we didn't have to do this sleep thing, I have too many things I want to do. And I hate missing events because I had to sleep.

In other news I'm teaching my ward's Gospel Doctrine class next week. So th. I know you've been waiting anxiously, but soon it may happen that I will do a Mango Svithe.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

As Some Of You Know

I've recently become a poker addict. It's true. I've always been a addict of most card games, those that know me well, know that at any moment I am completely game to play hearts. Spades and Rook are included in that as well. I just love card games. I also really like board games. The thing I really like about poker are tournaments. The thing being that it's not really a game about the cards but how you bet them and how you use the money to your advantage. Now I've been playing internet poker for about a month now, and when I posted about getting 84th place, that was pretty good. Ever since I haven't done as well and just sorta play for the fun of it. Well a couple of days ago which is the site I play on (Because it's the only one that is mac compatible) suddenly decided that for an entire month they would not allow people to play unless they have money in their account. I was a bit pissed, but thought, I do like these tournaments, and hey, it's like a sign up fee. So I did it, I put in the minimum amount which is ten bucks. Well that couldn't have come at a better time. Why? Well, today I was playing my best tournament, and that is pot limit Omaha. For those that aren't familiar with Pot Limit Omaha, it is slightly different from No Limit Hold Em. In No Limit games you can bet as much money as you want, doesn't matter. With Pot Limit, the maximum amount you can bet is how much is in the Pot. Hold Em gives you two cards and then there are five cards on the table. In Omaha, you are given 4 cards, BUT you can only use two of them and there are five cards on the table. It's easier to lose in Omaha and that's why I like it more then Hold Em. Well today I got 15th place. Which is pretty good for having only played a month or two. I won 3 bucks! Woo! With this three bucks I plan on spoiling myself by going to FYE and finding some dvd which through my discounts I can find for about 3 bucks and buy that. Then I can say poker bought me this dvd. It'll probably end up being the movie "One Night At McCool's" which is a decent movie and I think it would be a cool movie to own, and it is only 3 bucks there.

So I'm happy because I really just enjoy the whole game, I played for free, and got a couple bucks out of it.

Oh, and I did all of this while at work, I have the best job ever. It's funny too, because I would have to turn away from the game while I was actually working, which helped me out a lot too because I wouldn't play those hands and people would go out while I couldn't play.

But it was amazingly hard to get even that far, and I did get out with a really good hand that I thought I might win, but the cards wouldn't have it. Still I'm happy with my 15th place. I don't suspect I'll ever get 1st, but it's still a fun game to play. Now we'll have to see if I can do my homework when the semester comes, if not, I'll have to ban myself from poker altogether. Heh. We'll see.

Sunday, July 09, 2006


My pickiness has been called into question by one Rachel and she seems to think that she is pickier then I. So I will now classify how I am picky and we'll see how she or any of you others can dispute your ligitamacy in the pickiness war. So here we go.

1. I do not like anything sour.

If it's sour, I do not like it. Pickles are out, sour candy, anything containing vinegar. Now there are slight exceptions, Wendy's makes a good honey mustard that tastes more of honey then other honey mustards. I like that kind of honey mustard. Another thing that is sour are the berry family. I do not like raspberries, strawberries, blackberries, blueberries or cherries. I do like jams of each but not pies. Though I do like blueberry pie but that's because of my mission and being in the area that produces most of the blueberries in the world.

2. I do not like anything spicy.

This includes Hot foods. Now I don't mean hot as in cooked and it's warm out of the oven. No, I mean I don't like medium salsa because it's too strong for me. I can't handle spice, and yet people seem to love it, I just can't figure it out.

3. I do not like anything Tart and/or Tangy

This can go in the same catergory as sour, but some might see somethings in this catergory that they wouldn't in others.

4. I do not like anything bitter.

Some people seem to like to damage their taste buds with bitter foods. I just do not like them.

5. I do not like anything Italian.

Now this is a bit off because any time I say this someone asks, "well how about pizza?" And i have to say, yes, I do like american pizza, but I dislike Italian Pizza. Have you ever had true italian pizza? It's so very loaded with tomato. Basically I don't like anything with tomato in it, which is basically everything italian. I like that white sauce, so I'll eat stuff with that, as long as I have salt.

6. I do not like anything European.

I usually say this after Italian because people often think of Italian as it's own catergory, but I basically don't like any European foods. Name it I probably don't like it. Especially German. I very much dislike it because it's all about vinegar and really greasy meat.

7. I do not like breakfast foods.

Now this isn't as strong. I do like on occasion pancakes and/or waffles, but usually I can only have them once every three months. I don't like hash browns at all. I don't like sausage. I'm not a big fan of eggs.

8. Desserts

I have to be careful with this one because I do like a lot of desserts, but the following deserts I do not like. Any type of fruit pie (This includes apple and pumpkin). I do occasionally as I said before like blueberry pie. Cheesecake. I do not like cheesecake in any form. Carrot cake. No good. Most birthday cakes. Occasionally I like birthday cake. Tortes.

Now after all that there's gotta be something I do like. Well yes, I like most meats. I like most vegetables. I like most beans. And I love seafood. Now some would say because I like seafood I'm not picky because everyone hates seafood. Well, I still have a lot there I don't like. Basically if you give me anything Asian, I like it. Also Brazilian, that's not too spicy. And anything from the ocean or a lake. So there you have it.

Friday, July 07, 2006


Some have said that it is a disgraceful awful thing that I do not like most foods. However I actually like being a very picky eater. From what I can tell, everyone seems to like their own taste buds. After all, our own taste buds tell us when something is sweet, sour or any other miriad of flavors to choose from. Yet when we see that someone else doesn't like that thing which our tongue enjoys, we scoff at them for it is absurd that such a thing that could bring you such great joy would taste so awful to me. So, me being the same as everyone else, I enjoy my taste buds, because they tell me what I like and don't like and I can act accordingly. Now what is the one thing that my tongue likes more then anything else in the entire world?

Now what would you answer to this question? Most would say, cheesecake, or some sort of pasta. Most would say some sort of food. I however...

Salt. Oh glorious be the day that Salt was invented in the briny sea. I love salt more then I hate self rightousness. Salt can make almost any thing taste better. The only problem with salt for me however, is that it just does not taste good alone. If it did, I would consume salt by the truck loads. It's a good thing my tongue doesn't like truck loads of salt or I would be in trouble.

All of my favorite foods are my favorite foods because of salt. Steak, Mashed Potatoes, Chicken Salad, and onion soup to name a few, all made better with salt. Now of course there has to be a good mixture because too much salt can ruin a perfectly good meal, but my intake level is so much higher then most that your limit will be surpassed and I will be on the brink of perfection.

Now all of these points are well and good, but do you know what the greatest thing about salt is? The fact that I inherted my mother's low blood pressure. I have very low blood pressure, yet because of my love of salt, I have normal blood pressure. Amazing.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Weight Loss and HAM

So, in the past 3 months I have lost a total of 30 pounds. That's right, I'm losing weight, now I seem to end up losing about 30 pounds every summer and then in the winter I gain it back. I hope to be able to capitalize this time and keep it down. Now what do I attribute my weight loss this time to? Kirkland Brand immitation slim fast shakes! Costco has these great slim fast type shakes which I will admit now is actually quite filling. I don't feel like eating after having one which is a very odd sensation for me. They do taste alright and I actually do enjoy them from time to time. But that's the only thing I can think of that is keeping my weight down. Well plus the fact that of most people I know I can fluxuate weight much more then the average human. I'm just that cool I know. So the direct result is I find that these shorts I'm currently wearing are falling down a lot. No longer can I pull of the skater punk look as it's gone past being able to ride on the hips. Now it just falls. And that's no good.

In other news I am very very happy about Steve's idea to have a writing group. I've been really surprised to find how many of the guys in the group actually write stuff. But the thing I like the most about it is it gives me insentive to write my novel. And because of this, in the past two weeks I've written up to 15 pages and have 4 basic chapters down. I seem to find that the way I write is like a mixture of a novel and a screenplay. I don't like writing in screenplay format but the general feel almost feels like a screenplay. I've also found that I'm good at getting the general point across. I can see why most people say they go through a couple revisions. This first draft is definatly that, a draft. But so far I am pleased with how much I've been able to write and general consensus of how it's been recieved. I seem to be the only one writing this kind of story which does feel refreshing. I think it the best format my novel would eventually be found in would be a graphic novel or a comic book of sorts. But anyways, we'll see. I think I'll go ahead and post some of my story on here, or at another location which I will link to. Then I would hope that any of you who read this, might give some comments on it. But we'll get to that when it comes up.

And on a last note. I really love my job.

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Garfield is funny for once.

I love my new job. I'm currently at it by the way. It's sort of a cubicle job except it has a lot of free lag time and I'm the only one here so I can watch movies and play music as loud as I want. It's wonderful. It is a little stuffy in here and today since I have to do the FICHE I have to wear gloves. But that too is alright, because I won't be doing FICHE most of the time. FICHE is more hands on. It's actually just fiche, but imagine me saying FICHE really loud. Cause it's a fun word. FICHE is pronounced like Fish except with a rich frenchman's accent.

The garfield comic is from my good friend WiL. I now think edited garfield is funny. Expect to see more posts from me as I have a great place to write being this job.

Oh and for those in the know (Master Fob), I am a complete Quannum fanatic. Lyrics Born is my favorite of all of them as I now have all of his released stuff. You (MF) and I need to have a music trading party before you go into the unknown where we can celebrate all things Quannum. If The Master doesn't read this, then I may have to direct him this way.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Summer of Concerts

Here are the following concerts I want to go to this summer. If any of these interest any of you let me know. If no one comes with me I'll still probably go to each of these so it's no big deal.

This friday String Cheese Incident with Bob Weir and Ratdog is playing at Great Salt Air in SLC. I was already planning on going up earlier in the day to see the movie "Lady Vengance" so maybe I'll stay there and go to the concert. Though I didn't know about it until now I may not just cause it's not enough time to prepare. I have seen SCI twice and have really enjoyed them and would love to see them again as it has been a number of years. I haven't yet seen Ratdog or Weir.

Then the next friday 7/7/06 Blues Traveler is playing at the Suede in Park City which is a very good venue. I haven't yet seen Blues Traveler and I understand John Popper is absoultly phenomanol live.

4 days later 7/11/06 (Tuesday) Particle and Ozric Tentacles are playing at The Depot in SLC. Particle is a really good mix of electronics and jamming which really makes me want to see them live. I haven't ever heard of Ozric Tentacles but I love hearing new stuff.

Paul Oakenfold plays the next night (7/12/06) in SLC at In The Venue, I probably won't make it to this one unless others want to go. I'd really like to try out such a blatgant dance party atmosphere with such a dancy DJ. It would be a really interesting experience.

One Week later (7/19/06) Rusted Root goes to The Depot in SLC playing with Zox. This is another I would probably only go to if I went with friends. I enjoy Rusted Root but maybe not enough to see them in concert, plus I've never heard of Zox.

Edit: (7/22/06) Saturday. My friend Pat has expressed interest in heading down to Las Vegas to see Steely Dan. It's more likely I'll go to this one if I'm not driving. But still this one could get expensive and drop out a good number of the rest.

(7/24/06) The Monday after Rusted Root, we've got three very interesting bands that I've heard a lot of good about but haven't listened to too much of their music. Them being Panic at the Disco!, Dresden Dolls, and The Hush Sound. All playing at In The Venue in SLC. I may have to try borrowing a copy of Panic from Petra or Optimistic to see how they are and see if I want to try my luck at this one.

(7/27/06) This one is the thursday after and one of my absolute favorite bands of all time is coming to In The Venue in SLC, and which band is that? Ween. Oh man I love Ween. I've only seen them once before and though it was amazing they weren't able to play for long because production value of the festival was very low. I am definatly excited to see if I can make it out for this one, though I won't be able to have Joe with me for this one which is a sad day, and I would assume I won't be able to convince any of my other friends to go see them so I'm pretty sure this one I'll be going at it alone.

A very compelling concert is one on 8/6/06 which is a sunday night, and that is Herbie Hancock at the Red Butte Garden Amphitheater in SLC. I don't think I will make it to this one unless I can get friends to go, but it would be gauranteed to see such a renowned Jazz artist live to be an amazing experience. As one of my favorite Jazz artists I think this one would be really cool to see.

8/8/06 has Death Cab For Cutie coming to UVSC. I don't think I will make it to this one as I'm not a big fan of Death Cab though I really enjoy Postal Service. I might go if someone convinces me to go with them, so if you're looking for someone to go with you cause you do want to make it I would be willing to go at that point.

8/16/06! (Wednesday) This one is the first of my three gauranteed concerts of the summer. I will definatly go no matter what. It's going to be Mars Volta playing with Red Hot Chili Peppers at the Delta Center in SLC. Now most people will probably be going for RHCP however I am going mainly for Mars Volta, as one of my top five favorite bands I've discovered in the past year I can not wait to see these guys play. They are so incredibly inventive and play things you will not hear out of any other band. I'm sure RHCP will headline the show so I'll make sure to be there early for Mars Volta, and I'm sure RHCP will also put on a good show. I'm sure this one I'll be able to get the most people to say that want to go so let me know.

8/18/06! (Friday) The second of my three gauranteed concerts of the summer. Galactic will be playing at Harry O's in Park City. Galactic is officially my favorite band to see in concert and is also the band I've seen the most in concert as I'm currently at three times. Their best concert was the summer of 05 when they had a free concert in the middle of SLC. It was such a good concert that they begged the venue if they could play another half an hour. The first set wasn't all that great but it was enough to filter out enough people to keep the hardcore fans. Joe has already confirmed his desire to come to this one, so I have at least one with me. Which does remind me that i need to call Nick.

(reminder to self: Call Nick)

8/22/06 (Tuesday) Ben Harper and Damian "Jr. Gong" Marley at USANA in West Valley. This one would be a very fun one to go to, and I imagine I could get people to come with me. Though by this time I may become concerted out and not have as much money as I thought up to this point.

8/27/06 (Sunday) Wolf Parade at In The Venue in SLC. I just found out about Wolf Parade maybe 4 days ago and have liked what I've heard so far, so depending on the price and the time I have is whether I go to this one.

8/30/06 (Wednesday)) Dave Matthews Band with Robert Randolph and The Family Band. Being as how I've been a fan of DMB for a very long time this one would be a good concert to go to, also being as how i've heard good things about Rob as well. But being as how DMB is very well known I imagine this one to be just too expensive.

9/11/06 (Monday) The third of my three gauranteed concerts of the summer features Jurassic 5 and X-Clan at The Depot in SLC. It's been a long standing dream of mine to see J5 in concert and here's my chance to do so. I haven't heard of X-Clan but I'm sure I'll know more about them soon.

And that is it. Honorable mentions could also go to Warped Tour which is at some point and might be fun to go to, but the rest are a bit more pressing to go to. So as I've said before if anyone that reads this finds one of these that they would like to go to as well let me know.

Saturday, June 24, 2006

I'm Free

I'm now free from the DA, there were some things I really liked and some things I really disliked. It was weird my last day, because one or two of the kids started getting the teary glazy eyes. I actually felt really bad that I was leaving them. I need to leave for my own sanity, but those kids are going insane in there. I just hope they'll be okay.

But now that I'm free I've had this weekend to relax and recouperate. It's been really nice. All i've basically done is played a lot of poker tournaments and watched movies and such. Very boring. I've also been buying things. I'm not too bad when it comes to money, just sorta bad. I am a pack rat after all. I made my 11th purchase on ebay. I'm up to 11 now. It was actually something I've wanted for a really good price, Season One of Star Trek the Next Generation. Wooo.

The main thing that is driving me crazy is the lack of socialness I've had to endure. Living so far away doesn't help at all for that. I just really like being around people. But now I can, with my new job. It'll just be really different.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Social Blasphemies of a year ago

(Note: I found this post as a draft about a year ago, It'd be nice to finish it but I think it's good as is. Enjoy.)

Hmmm, I find myself having some time to right something, so I think I shall. Let us speak of Blasphemy, and no not religious blasphemy, blasphemy in a social sense. For instance....

I do not like Cheesecake in any form.

What was the first word that came to your mind when you read that sentence? For most of you it was Blasphemy. Maybe because I already put it in your head, but you probably would have thought that anyways. Alrighty, here goes another, and I know of a bunch of people that will spurn me for this one.

I'm not a big fan of Sufjan Stevens.

I like some of his songs, but overall it's not an album I'm going to go back to a bunch. On my iTunes each song has been listened to at least 3 times, because I keep wanting to give it a chance. But I'm not finding it. It's a clever cd, but there are too many moments where I have to change the trackbecause it gets too annoying.

The Two Towers is one of the most boring movies I've ever seen.

Sunday, June 18, 2006


So it turns out these poker tournaments happen every two hours, and to actually win a prize you have to have four player points. How do you get player points? Well basically you have to have lost around the amount of an iPod to get four player points, then you can get 20 bucks if you get first. So I decided to keep playing anyways because I find it to be a lot of fun. I've played three more tournaments since that one. All of them have been out of 2000 people. The first I got somewhere around 1400, the second I got out within a couple minutes and got 1950 or so. Then this last time I got as far as 81. It's really fun when you can make it that high. It sucks when you're gone in the first half hour. It's also fun to watch your netflix shows while playing a tournament.

Saturday, June 17, 2006

184th place

I just did my first free online poker tournament. I finished in 184th place out of 1156 players. I went for 1 hour and 28 minutes. I was doing really well until I made a vital mistake and then I was out a hand or two later. I'm a little pissed at when I went out. I thought I could have been in it a lot longer. It was incredibly fun though. I don't like internet tournaments as much as playing in real life, mainly due to the fact that it's really really hard to bluff because you can't see what the other people are doing. I'm quite good at watching people and that's what I find the most fun out of the whole thing. I do like these free tournaments. First prize is twenty bucks! Wooo! Only people in the top ten get money. So obviously not that much, but it would have been cool to get further in. But I am somewhat proud of my first time. I'm of course still not going to put real money into it, cause look at me, I got 184th place. Not in the top ten. Even then I would probably only use the money I won. Get it up to 300 and then get a new iPod.

Oh well. In other news I got my new job which has better hours, better pay and a lot less stressful. I'm excited. It's with a microfilm company, basically I load the machines and make sure they don't fall apart and then I can do whatever I want. Internet access is there, so it'll be good. I'll probably bring in my computer when I have film stuff I need to do. It'll be grand. It's graveyard shift so it goes from midnight to 7 am, considering I'm posting this right before I go to bed at 6:30 am, I'll be fine. It's just the first week I'm concerned about since I gave my old job two weeks notice and they're going to hold me to it, so wednesday I have work from 3pm to 11pm then from midnight to 7 am. That'll only be wednesday, monday and the next wednesday then I'm done. Phew.