Monday, November 28, 2005

Mini Movie and TV Reviews

Movies I've seen recently.

Rent- Good movie, with even better music. But then, I'm a sucker for musicals. Replay Value: Good

Jarhead- The movie anyone going to war should see. About a sniper in desert storm. Pretty good but also very gruesome. Replay Value: Low

Changing Lanes- Got for three dollars off a recommendation. Pretty good story with crazy mood changes. Replay Value: Maybe Once more

Zatoichi- Awesome movie, some of the best sound in any movie. Replay value: High

Conan The Barbarian- This movie sucks. Holy cow this movie sucks. Though the best part is near the beginning. Conan sees lady, lady invites him in, conan and lady have sex, during sex lady becomes demon, conan throws demon woman in fire, she becomes spirit and flies away, conan brushes himself off, goes on with rest of story, nothing more is said of demon sex woman. What a weird movie. Replay Value: Maybe once for a bad movie night.

TV shows I like right now

The Boondocks (Cartoon Network) - This show is awesome. If you have Cartoon Network you should be watching this show.

South Park - This show really has everything going for it. Parker and Stone are geniuses being able to mix any social commentary with humor and making fun of everyone.

Desperate Housewives - A really good blend of humor with drama and slyness that makes me like the show.

Boston Legal - William Shattner, Betty White, James Spader, and Candice Bergen. Wow, what a great show.

Colbert Report - Stephen Colbert is so funny, I especially like how self serving he is.

That's enough from me tonight.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Needs

Ha Ha, I saw this on Duchess' blog and I did it for myself but I actually found it to be quite humorous so I'm going to do it now. Name has been replaced with Thirdmango for one specific reason... Bum bum bum.

Thirdmango needs a poke in the other eye.
Thirdmango needs to change his classroom management practices.
Thirdmango needs a new name!
Thirdmango needs to answer some questions.
Thirdmango needs help.
Thirdmango needs a consequence for misbehavior.
Thirdmango needs experienced adoptive parents willing to provide daily.
Thirdmango needs a Protractor.
Thirdmango needs to be a member of the Administrator's group on his own computer in order to install antivirus software.
Thirdmango needs to raise about $10000 American dollars in financial backing.
Thirdmango needs to find a pit filled with punji sticks.
Thirdmango needs to do this training for two days.
Thirdmango needs to learn how to spell "allowed" before he ridicules other people's work.
Thirdmango needs change for the bus.
Thirdmango needs someone 1 on 1 most of the time.
Thirdmango needs lots of support on the home front and elsewhere to help him maintain good boundaries.
Thirdmango needs to call me, by the way...
Thirdmango needs everyone's thoughts, well-wishes -- and financial help.
Thirdmango needs a break today... a coffee break...
Is there anything Thirdmango needs?
I don't think Thirdmango needs to be with anybody until he gets his self together. He is to violent. He needs mental help.
Thirdmango needs to be put in prison and locked up for life.
Thirdmango needs to learn that his actions can ultimately destroy the very cause he seeks to protect.

Well that's three google pages of what I need. I'm a mess.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

A True Story


So Today I went with my friend to have some Chinese Buffet. As usual my ritual is to not open up the fortune cookie until after I've finished my meal and then I must eat the whole cookie before reading the fortune. Today was just like all the other days, I finished my cookie, read my fortune, put it in my pocket and went on my way.

About two hours later I was in the Movie Trading Company looking for some movies when I suddenly felt something between my toes, I thought it may be a pebble or a seed. I took of my shoe and in between my toes was a paper, I took it out and it was my fortune from the fortune cookie. It had somehow fallen out of my pocket and into my shoe. And what did the fortune say?

"When there's a will, there's a way."

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Intermission


I stepped on a
nail today.

Then I got a
Tetnis Shot.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

My Mission Story (Abridged)

(Note: This is the abridged version of my mission and my testimony of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. If you have a problem with that then I'll just state an overwhelming "Screw You" right here. Ha Ha. But this is done somewhat by special request, so here is the story and also note that this isn't the best way to be a missionary or to go on a mission, but I did it and I'm glad I did. Oh yeah, and even though this is abridged it's also long, so if you want to skip it go ahead. Oh, and EYA has probably heard all of this before, so sorry.)

This all starts freshman year of college. I was an average college student, you know, the one who lounges around and who doesn't have a testimony of the church he was raised in. The average kind. Yes, I went to church, but I didn't mentally go to church, I went mostly for the fact of going meant people would get off my back, if I didn't go then there'd be something wrong. Then I turned 19. I went to Gerogia that year for Christmas, my grandma being the woman that she is bless her soul, made a comment to me when we were alone.

G: Are you going on a mission?
Me: I'm sure I'll go, it's just not the time yet.
G: Well if you don't go, you're out of the will.
Me: Grandma, it's not about the will, I just can't go when it's not the right time.

That's how my grandma works, she has a jaded view of how the gospel works and if the church were the way she thought is was, then I wouldn't be in it. That was one of my major hang ups, and sort of still is. The different interpretations of the Church that different people give it. I've recently learned for myself that I really need to have my own foundation and keep that foundation otherwise I'll be pushed out very fast because I'm definatly not the model member.

So winter semester came around and everyone around me was getting mission calls, and I realized I'd better do it soon too. Because well, it was just sort of expected of me to do it. So I sent in my mission papers and got my call to go to the New Hampshire Manchester Mission. So when people ask, "why did you go on a mission?" If I answer truthfully I can say, "Too please others and frankly to get it over with." Most people seem to say because they had a testimony or they knew it was for them, nope, not me.

So then there was the temple, and let me say, if you don't have a testimony, do not go to the temple. That almost stopped me from going. Once you have a testimony then I say it's applicable to go and it's a good place to learn. But definatly don't go if you don't have a testimony.

Then I went into the MTC. The MTC was nice because I had a disfunctional group of weirdos. Plus I injured myself, which was nice too. Basically all my memories from the MTC are of pranks and fun things we did such as riding mattresses down the stairs.

Then my first area of my mission, I was such a greenie, I had no idea what to expect. It probably didn't help that my trainer had no tact whatsoever. Those three months were very rough, I didn't want to be there, I had dreams every night that i was back at home talking to friends saying, yeah I'm back, I'm so glad to be home. I would also wish I would get hit by a car so I could go home honorably.

When the three months were up I went to Vermont with my second companion which was a very refreshing moment. It was nice because he was incredibly knowledgeable, he taught me a lot, and he was fun. Oh yeah, and he had a broken knee. He got me aquainted with the area which was the most psychotic area of my mission when it came to crazy shit that can happen in an area. It was the highest rate of inactivity in our mission. 100 active out of 530 people. I was with him for three weeks and then he went home to get surgery done on his knee. I then got my third companion. Now imagine this, here I am, out for three and a half months, still with no testimony and my companion comes in and I have to take charge. But see I thought it wouldn't be too bad, what i didn't know was who I was getting as a companion. This guy had 9 weeks left and he wouldn't talk to anyone. When he would get mad at me he wouldn't say anything to me literally for 5 days. 3 weeks into this companionship I suddenly came to the realization. This was me at the end of my mission if I stayed the way I was. So I made a decision. It was either shape up or ship out.

So I decided to find out if the Book of Mormon really was true, and after that I would decide whether to stay on my mission or go home. So in a matter of about 2-3 weeks I read the whole book of mormon. It's actually quite easy when your companion really wants to sit home and do nothing. So I finished it one night around 1 am, and then I went to pray about it. I prayed for a long while and then when I was done I said amen and I waited for an answer. And wouldn't you know it. I got nothing. I had a pretty strong belief in God at this point that i figured he would be at least kind enough to tell me yes or no, but to sit there and not say anything? So I tried again, sure enough, nothing. So I looked at the scripture Moroni 10:3-5. And when I saw the words real intent I suddenly realized what i had to do. So in my prayer I told God that if this were true and he would tell me so I would definatly know, then I would be faithful the rest of my life and wouldn't falter, but if he said no, I would stop this right now and go home. When I had real intent, that's when I recieved an clear and definate answer of Yes. I can't tell you how it felt because I can't recreate it, but I can tell you, it wasn't a warm fuzzy or anything like that. It was God saying "It's true" to me. Then I knew what i had to do, I had to be faithful the rest of my life, even though I knew there would be a lot of opposition especially among members of the church who wouldn't want me around, which has happened quite a bit.

So suddenly with renewed faith and a willingness to go forward I thought, here we go, I can now be a missionary and the Lord will send me someone who can help me become that. But what I didn't account for was that the Lord works in much different ways. See, now, he was going to test to see if I'd actually do what I said. What came next was the 6 months of Hell. I got a new companion, he was from Canada and he was in my MTC district and I had thought, I really don't want to be his companion. But I got him, he was severly obsessive compulsive and a germaphobe taboot and he had a definate testimony of deep doctrine and not of basic doctrine. He had never prayed but felt he didn't ever need to because he had never felt doubt of the truthfulness of our message. He had little to no social skills, and I was asked by my mission president to see if I could help him in any way possible. So for 6 weeks I tried while everyone in the ward complained to me of his behavior and complained to my mission president of his behavior. So after 6 weeks we split up and I went to Maine and he went to Mass.

Well I got with a "cool" companion. Someone who I thought I wasn't really all that cool, so he decided we shouldn't really do anything, which we did. But he continually smeared my reputation and did everything he could to get me out of there. Well it worked and after 6 weeks I was transfered to somewhere else in Maine. In this area I had a companion who was going home in 6 weeks and really didn't want to do anything. This was the 6 week period that I felt the most insane in. Still to this day I can find a reason why I was in every area of my mission except the 6 weeks in this area. I can't name a single reason why I was there. At the end of the six weeks I thought I would stay there since my companion was going home. But my mission president called me up and had a special question for me. He was wondering if I could go to Mass and serve with the Canadian again, because apparently I was the only person in the mission who could tolerate him. At this point I really didn't care so I said sure and I went to Mass.

In this area was the second time I seriously comtemplated going home. I had done little to nothing up to this point and I was almost a year in, I had many other missionaries besmerch my name and people from around the mission were calling me up to see if it what they heard from so and so was true such as, "Did you really have sex with someone?" or "Did you really go on a drunken rampage?" Also having all the missionaries around me continually saying how bad a missionary I was and that I should just go home because I obviously wasn't accomplishing anything. At the same time my Canadian companion was also going through the exact same abuse and he was sick of it all too. So for 6 weeks we worked together and I tried to help him with his social skills. We just tried to not think about what other people thought and just do what we could. Well after these 6 weeks I met with my mission president and he said, "Well I asked a favor of you and you did it, now you can ask a favor of me, where in the mission do you want to go?" I knew exactly where I wanted to go. I wanted to go to Machias Maine. Machias was known as outer darkness in our mission, the place where you'd never be heard from again because it was so far away. Exactly what I wanted.

So he granted me my wish. I went to Machias. The biggest reason was to get away from other missionaries, because then I could be a real missionary and not have to deal with missionaries who were all concerned about putting other missionaries down so they could get ahead. The 6 months I spent in Machias were the best of my life. When people say "My mission was the best two years of my life," I can say, "Machias Maine was the best 6 months of my life." The Lord finally knew I was ready to go and me and my companion turned on fire. With no other missionaries around besides our district leader 60 miles away the only thing we could think about was the gospel. I was with that guy for 4 and a half months. Together we accomplished so much for the people there and so much for ourselves. After he left I got another guy for 6 weeks who was also very good and we tore it up. In the two years I was on a mission I had 6 baptisms, 5 of which were in Machias. No where else did I understand more fully Love for the people then I did there. As i write this I have such a feeling that I love that city and the area surrounding it and such a need to go back and live there at some point. At the end of that I felt so accomplished and so happy that I could burst.

When those 6 months were over a mix up occured, I was supposed to go to Portland Maine but due to two seperate accidents I ended up going to Dover-Foxcroft Maine with the one guy in the mission that I knew I would never get along with in any situation. In those six weeks he would not leave the apartment unless we went to eat or go buy GQ magazine. He talked to his girlfriend in the branch every night on the phone and would talk to his friends at home ver regularly. I was told to just wait 6 weeks and do what i could, so I used those 6 weeks to study the scriptures and learn anything and everything I could. Which was a good idea, because my next companion was a spitting image of me at the beginning of my mission. We spent 3 months together and had some amazing times and I was able to give him the wisdom I had gained.

I then ended my mission with 6 weeks in my final area with a decent fellow whom I got along with but we didn't do much, he had a laptop and many other distractions and he really didn't want to do anything, so I read my scriptures and played the game Chrono Trigger on his emulator. There were definatly some reasons for me being with him in that area and they were accomplished, but we'll get into those another time. Then I came home.

That is the story of my mission. Probably about twice a week I think, "The mission was really great, but I'm so glad it's over and I definatly don't want to do it again." Among uber Return Missionaries, I don't fit in because I don't have the RM aura, but you know, I'm glad of what my mission did for me and I accomplished some very good things. I'm proud of myself for doing it. So when such things as people calling me a sinner or people generally saying something rude to me in church, it doesn't affect me as much, because I know the church is true and we're all sinners even though we don't like to show it. And anyone who thinks that they're greater then anyone else is just fooling themselves. They don't understand the true meaning. I don't claim to know everything, and I don't agree with everything either, but I know what I know. And for me, that's enough, and someone telling me I'm not welcome isn't going to stop me, in fact it almost makes me want to keep going just so i can smile as they squirm, as they don't understand that they too are just like me.

Anyways, there's my little tirade. I hope you enjoyed entrance into my psyche. Good day and Good luck.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

We are Legion for we are Two Face


Two in One day is a little odd for me. But I have a lot to say.

I think I'd like to address a question or more of a comment Optimistic had a while back on his blog. (Sorry for not posting links to people's blogs, I don't want to have to go throught typing in the html coding, and it doesn't give me an easy link button like it does on pcs.) He had made mention of how people such as me (though he didn't say it was me but I did confirm I was a prime example) are extremely jovial in nature in the real world and yet it's like a two face effect happens on the internet where a whole different personality is exhibited. Now there's a perfectly good explanation for all of this. You ready for it?

He's right.

I am a two face. Well sort of. I may not be Harvey Dent here but I am definatly a man of many colors. It is true that in a group setting I am probably the most jovial fellow you will meet. Yet there is something you must all know. I am a complainer. I'm not a bad complainer, not one of those ones that will complain to everyone, no no. I'm more of a one time complainer. There aren't too many things that truely bug me for a long time, but through the years I've found that if something bugs me I can usually get rid of it by complaining once and getting it over with. I actually enjoy the act of complaining. I find it as a relief, but sometimes I allow something to fester enough that a simple complain won't let it dissappear, and thus I go into the multiple complain, which I do every so often. If you find me doing this, just throw something at me. But I've found that the best possible spot for me to complain is in this blogging world, where writing is the main form of communication. A perfect venue for me to spill my baggage into the river. But also a good venue to find ways of coping with it in different ways and finding thoughts by other people whom I would or would not have thought had insight into the situation.

So, yes people, I am a two face. Indeed a lot of us are, but when you get me alone, you'll find a different side to me, also you'll find my twisted views on reality, which are many for they are legion.

Post the 100th

For those that know me really well, they can all tell you that I'm quite absent minded. For instance yesterday I was thinking the whole day that Saule was going to be at Poetasters and I should bring the copy of Wizard People for him, I was thinking this up until I saw it in front of me and could have picked it up, but what did I do? I drove on over to Poetasters, got out of my car and realized it was not with me, a usual occurence for me, so I drove back and got it. I went to my parents house for dinner on sunday and as I was going for seconds withh my plate in my left hand, I looked down at the table and grabbed another fishcake with my fork. I was ready to put it in the plate when I noticed my plate was not on the table like I thought it was. I asked my mom if she had taken my plate until I realized it was in my left hand. Oh silly me, happens all the time. I forget if I've taken my heartburn medication a minute after taking it and will often take it again. These sort of things happen to me day in a day out, all the time. It almost makes me paranoid, such as when I have valubles in my car, I'll lock the door, walk across the parrking lot then I'll think, "Did I lock the door?" so I'll have to go back and check otherwise it'll bug me the entire time I'm doing whatever I'm doing. Well this past week I had one of the longest and most incredibly odd absent minded moments of my entire existence. Last night I was feeling really sick, it was a very queasy feeling as if I had just swallowed a live skunk whole. But my good friend Huntsman had called and said he wanted to go eat somewhere, plus he was paying since he just got a paycheck. The only thing I could think of that I could eat would be either a subway sandwich or a chicken salad. Well we went to subway and I was deciding whether I'd get a meal or not, as I was looking at the sodas I thought, I should probably have water... ... ...

Wait a second... ... ...

And suddenly it hit me, why I've been sick and my biggest absent minded blunder ever...

I hadn't drunken water in over a week. What? You just don't do that. But somehow, I just had. I mean, I had tiny amounts when I brushed my teeth, and I had a gulp or two at church, but that's about it. Now I am a water connoisseur, I love water. On my mission I made sure to drink about 8 glasses a day and I very rarely got sick. But because of this, there are sometimes flavors of water that I can't stand. Such as the water in my current apartment. Now usually when I have bad water, I'm fine with just getting a carton of water from somewhere else, but my engaged roommate is a Nazi when it comes to the Fridge. If he sees something in there that doesn't really have a purpose to be in there, he'll just get rid of it, unless it's his of course. So I've tried to use the fridge as little as possible. So lately I've been drinking a lot of milk and a lot of soda, but no water. Blimey. So i had the subway sandwich and a whole lot of water, and wouldn't you know it, I felt better.

Monday, November 07, 2005

I finally found that cd I've been looking for

I've been accidently falling asleep a lot lately. Mainly just in the past couple days. It started thursday night when I fell asleep at about 1 am and woke up at 8 am. Then Saturday night at Optimistic's house I fell asleep on his floor for half an hour. Then last night I fell asleep 15 minutes before ward prayer at 8:30 pm and woke up this morning at 5:30 am, when I usually go to sleep. I went full circle. I am a little miffed at it. Oh well.

I found out today that I'm an amazing MadGab player. I was playing with this girl in my ward and it was us two against three others, and I would say it in my slurred tone and she would get it immidiatly. We were a really good team.

I had a revelation the other day, and maybe I'm wrong so I'll leave it up to people's thoughts on the matter. I came to a realization about dating and what not. I think most people want to date and not be pressured into marrying right away. They just want a nice relationship. The problem is is that we all think that everyone else is thinking the opposite, that they want to get married. So say person A wants a nice relationship as does person B. But person A thinks person B wants to get married really bad, so persons A and B would have been able to have a good relationship but because A thought wrongly of B it didn't happen. Just a thought.

I posted this on Blue-Beta but I thought I might post it here. I realized about a week ago that a girl I had a crush on a while back, I didn't really have a crush on the actual her, but more the concept of her. For instance she liked a lot of same music I do, a lot of the same movies, she was a big fan of a lot of the same things I was into. But when I was with her, it always fizzled. Then I realized I liked her for the concept. But I didn't enjoy it as much being with her. I think I do that a lot, I'll put a specific thought of what someone is and draw off of that and make them into a crush. I did just that again just a couple days ago with someone else, I fell in love with a concept of a person, but of course it didn't flourish. I need to stop doing that, because I end up falling before anything has even started.

I'm excited, I got a call from my "ex-wife" last night, turns out the group is getting together on saturday to drive down to Goblin Valley, and we want to video tape the trip, it's going to be awesome, I'll be able to make it into a documentary. This is going to be fun. I'm glad I'll be able to get out of town.

Saturday, November 05, 2005

Not too much today

I picked up the new K-OS cd yesterday and it picks up an official nomination for my personal best album of the year award. This cd is amazing. So many different styles go into this cd, and it's so fluid in between tracks. I'm thinking I'm going to make my own best of 2005 awards, just for my own personal enjoyment. So far I have three nominations for best album of the year. K-OS, being the first, then also Fatboy Slim's Palookaville and Bloc Party's Silent Alarm. I have other nominations, I just need to check if they came out in 2005 or not.

I accidently got on a good schedule in the past couple days. I really didn't mean to, I just got tired and fell asleep at a decent hour and now I'm on a regular schedule.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

The Love Song

Alrighty, it's been a couple days. So first off I'd like to make mention of my awesomo pictures blog at fourthmango.blogspot.com this is entirely dedicated to cool pictures I find on the internet, some may have naughtly launguage so be forewarned, currently though there are a lot of funny Magic Cards on there, I especially like Limecat and once I get to a color printer I will print out Limecat and use it on people. But do know this, I have a big back log of pictures to post on there, so it will be updated pretty regularly.

Today I went to see the student film "This Divided State" about the Michael Moore contreversy. I almost forgot about but checked my email 5 minutes before the college democrats were going to leave so I jumped in my car and left. It was a pretty good film, it was really interesting to see all the stuff that had gone on. Afterwards there was a really good roundtable discussion that I thought was very thought provoking. I played the part of the "uninformed college student" which went over really well, because people there were really into politics and they forgot that the Uniformed also have votes too. I'm not really that uninformed, but if I suddenly give myself a glazed over look, then everyone thinks I am.

I finally watched the final Star Trek movie today. Star Trek Nemesis. It was really good to see a distinct ending to the whole Next Generation crew. It was a good Star Trek movie. It wouldn't have made any sense had you not been a fan of the show, so as just a movie, don't see it unless you liked the show. Because you won't like it otherwise.

So I have got to say, when it comes to music I'm really liking how this year has panned out, there has been some killer music that has come out lately. I'm especially liking how the underground hip hop scene is panning out. Music right now has just seemed to find out that there's a lot more freedom to really do crazy things in music and people will like what you're doing. For instance I am really into K-OS right now. He's a very musical hip hop guy, it's really cool finding that Hip Hop has found out how to have cool music behind their lyrics. It's been something they've needed for sometime, and they've finally come into it. Still the mainstream hip hop is going against these ideals and still going with monotone beats and songs about bitches and hos. Where as the side that I'm really getting into has some really cool things to say. And some really cool music behind it taboot. I'm going to post the lyrics to one of my faves of K-OS, it's called "The Love Song" and as you read it imagine violins, cellos and all manner of strings as well as drums and record scratching in the back ground.

Contrary to popular belief...
This is not a lovesong
It's a sonnet
Damn, it feels good to have people up on it but
I'm just a fool playing with the Master's tools
Learning how to break the rules of this record company pool
Hallucination - I see with my eyes
But my heart's telling me lies
Why do I fantisize?
Why am I telling lies to the people from the stage
Pretending it's all good when inside it's fire and rage
Cuz I can't understand how a man lives off the life of another man
Tryin to pimp the universe - that's a joke
I stay rockin the boat down on my last note
It's murder she wrote
Assassination vocabulary
I see your termination is heavily necessary
I should have known - they do it for funds alone
I do it to break the walls if I fall off then let me know people

CHORUS
It's funny how life can go
First you ride high then you might lay low
Don't get high off your own supply
Someone said first before a fall comes pride
This is my message to the world
Just tryin to reach every boy and girl
Not tryin to say if it's right or wrong
This is not a love song

Lyrical optometrists with 20/20 vision
Are serving rounds like my granny used to serve provisions
Chaotical amneotical fluid
The rap druid is fluent with the art of onomatopoeia
Mans an invisible microscopic topic dropper
When I was a kid I wanted rollerskates and a bike chopper
But alas, pop, pop never thought to keep me in style
Thats why I'm schizophrenic now
So God bless the child that has his own
The harvest we reap is what we sow
Chrome microphone - shoot it
There was a dome of computer digital clones that could be mixed for lots of pistones
Sayin a style's their own when they bite like Mike Furounsville
The sounds ill
Relationship is a mirror
That you see yourself up in and the picture is clearer
That's why I'm on the scene with a mic like Ernesto Guevara
While they exploited nights like Geraldo Riviera
They just...

CHORUS

It's easy not to care what people say
It's harder to pretend and try
Cuz they can only love you from yesterday
I'm looking at the now they pose high
I'm just a man who's walking
They stand around and keep talking
They tried to clip my wings
But wisdom fills so many things
Say it again
I'm just a man who's walking
They stand around and keep talking
They tried to clip my wings
But wisdom fills so many things

It's funny how life can go
Don't get high off your own supply
This is my message to the world...