Friday, December 30, 2005

Directing My Life

Though I don't post these things often, I wasn't going to post it until I got the results and it's one of my favorite directors, and if he had any intention of doing my life sotry I'd let him do it in a heart beat.





Woody Allen

Your film will be 56% romantic, 37% comedy, 27% complex plot, and a $ 24 million budget.

Be prepared to have your life story shot entirely in New York City -- though lately Woody's been loving shooting in London. Also, your music soundtrack is all jazz from before 1949. Filmography: Annie Hall, Manhattan, Stardust Memories, Everyone Says I Love You, etc. Woody has released one film per year consistently for the past 35 years. For the past 15 years he's been trying to make films like his older, funnier ones, just like characters in his Stardust Memories film suggest throughout. Regardless of his personal life, his films are American classics.













My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 70% on action-romance
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 54% on humor
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 12% on complexity
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 12% on budget




Link: The Director Who Films Your Life Test written by bingomosquito on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Look Ma, My Very Own List!

Merry Late Christmas to all those involved, I've been meaning to get on this over the break, however, I've had a hella good break. I really like Provo during Christmas break. And now here's a list of things I've done and/or liked about the break.

*I went to UVSC to fix my being a teacher problem. Most people didn't believe me until I ran into a mission buddy who I showed it to that works in the computer office. He then helped me out, turns out I'm teaching classes for fall semester of 05. In other words there's a professor who went mad because suddenly he couldn't imput anyone's grades in, and apparently I could. Ha Ha.

*Also at UVSC I saw one of my companions for the first time since the mission. Though it wasn't happy since he was one of the ones I didn't want to see. He hasn't changed. :p

*The streets in Provo are dead. It's so great, the other night I was out on the road and more then half the cars I saw were cops.

*Having no roommates at all for a couple days did wonders for my room, being able to let things spill out into the hallway made it possible for me to rearrange, now I have a lot of extra room.

*The 23rd was a cool day, I spent the entire day with no human contact. Well except for the girl that helped me get some fried chicken at Albertsons. I think I also talked to someone online, but that doesn't count.

*I beat Shadow of the Colossus again.

*I've been borrowing some cds from my good friend Joe and he's given me some really cool stuff. Keller Williams is someone I think everyone would enjoy.

*Christmas was awesome. My family being very non traditional was very nice. I think the part I liked the most was not having a Christmas Tree, they're always such a bother. It was all about just spending time with the fam.

*Watched Jackie Brown with my mom, that is an awesome movie.

*Watched Porko Rosso, that is a very wonderful movie.

*Had fun playing Poker with Katya, Asmond, Scottro and Saule. I realized I'm a very agressive player, I got some good advice on tv later that day, you should be folding most of the game. Interesting thought, I got too entrenched in betting. I would love to play with them again.

*Went on a fun date which I really enjoyed, we tried to out-nerd each other which I liked. Not often can I find someone who can out-nerd me in a lot of areas.

*Thought of a new idea for a story which I'm really liking the concept of and in which I'll probably need help from each and all of you that read this blog. I'll give more info on it a little later when it's more so in fruitation.

*Have started writing up some new year's resolutions and I'm really liking where I'm going with them. I also like the fact that a lot of them people will outright disagree with. Such as, spend less time focusing on accomplishments.

*Went to an awful Japanese Buffet with my mom and brother. It's on Center Street in Provo, it is awful.

*Forgot how much i liked walking outside at 3 in the morning listening to music. Got reaquainted with such things.

*I now like the show Stroker and Hoop.

*I finally got a picture of me with an afro on my computer, expect it up at some point.

*I got a really nice set of poker chips for Christmas, mainly because it was a 50 dollar set, marked down to 7 because it's Provo. Ha Ha, I love Provo.

That about covers it. Let me know you're still alive and have a really good rest of the week, cause I'm sure I will.

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Risks


I sometimes wonder if I'm willing to take risks. I was watching the second season of Scrubs today, and It had this part about taking risks and willingness and what not and I thought, "I can usually take risks. But with certain things I just can't." I like taking risks, because they usually end up being for the better in the long run anyways. But sometimes I like to sit back in the shadow and not be seen. I think it has more to do with the effort that risk taking has then actually the risk involved. If I didn't have to use as much effort. I think I'd be good. Oh well.

I have had a good couple days. It's been an honor to meet some more people at the parties. It was nice to meet VR and Scottro and the King of Ice. We played hold em today and I was a magnificent bastard that would not stay down.

Here's a question for you, what swear words do you consider funny? I love the word Bastard and I can see myself using it in almost every context. Anyways, sorry for being so incommunicato on this thing as of late and in posting comments. I haven't been on as much lately.

Sunday, December 18, 2005

3 Dreams in 1 Night

So I had three freaky dreams friday night. Well the first two were freaky and the third was more so just annoying. So first I shall tell the third. But first some back story.

I was hanging out with some good friends on friday night. We had played Rook and were now playing some really exciting games of Dr. Mario. I was playing exceptionally well, so much so that I almost wish I was playing again Angry Block and Optimistic. So it comes to be about one in the morning and midway through one of these intense games my phone rings. I'm perfectly fine with most people calling at this time and have told most that if you ever need to call me at night, it's perfectly fine, but there are a select few in whom I have never told this to. Well I told Mark to see who it was and he tells me it's my roommate Frenchie. I have never told Frenchie he could call me this late and I didn't want to talk to him so I said, "Don't answer it." Well then he calls again, and I told Mark not to answer it. Then he calls AGAIN. Well this time I think, well it must be an emergency, I'll answer it, so we pause the game and I answer it, "Hey 3M, how you doing?" Fine, what's up? "Where are you?" At my friends place, what's up? (He's notorious for not getting to the point) "Hey, I was just wondering which restaurants would be open tomorrow at 10 am." (This confused me, was this all he wanted?) Uh, all of them. "Really?" Yes. "You sure?" Yes. "Um, which ones would you recommend?" (I'm getting a bit miffed now) I dunno, Applebees, Training Table. "Oh, okay, thanks, have a good night." *Hangs up* Three rings at 1 am about restaurants. Oh boy I was miffed. Here I thought it was an emergency.

So fast forward to my third dream of the night, it was my roommate frenchie calling me at 6 in the morning waking me up from sleep, "Hey, are you sure they open at 10?" Ugh.

Now, for the first of the dreams. I was walking out to a consturction site when suddenly I saw an Elder from my mission, he was one in whom we never got along and really didn't like each other at all, and one in whom I still have bitterness towards, he had a sledgehammer in his hand. When he saw me he shouted "F*** you" and started swinging the sledgehammer at me. It was very scary and drawn out.

Now for the second dream which makes me laugh the most right now. My other roommate Teddy has been opening my door without asking, and I'm big person when it comes to privacy, so I've been locking the door when I'm in my room. The other thing is, that he's basically mister gospel guy, I can't seem to have a conversation with him that isn't geared around religion or sports. Well the dream happened like this, I had just gone into my room to play Final Fantasy when suddenly he started opening my door, I stopped him but he had a little crack of the door open and he pried his fingers in there. He then shouted, "Open up, I have a spiritual thought for you." "No," I shouted, "I want to play video games." "But it's about Christ!" He then pushed harder to get in, "Well, I'm studying about James, so you don't need to come in," He let go of his grip at this and then said, "Well as long as you're studying the scriptures then I won't make you hear my spiritual thought, But, once you're done, let me know and then we can talk about Christ." It was a very scary dream, and I think Freud may have something to say about it.

Mini Movie Reviews #2

Do The Right Thing, a Spike Lee Joint from 1989. This movie deals with racism quite a bit, but not just racism against black people, but racism against Chinese, Italians and a bunch others featured in the film. It takes place on a street in Harlem and introduces a lot of good characters. This was the second time I had seen this movie, the first time being a couple of years ago. This movie definatly helped Spike lee get on the map. I really like it personally but wouldn't recommend it to all. If you're fine with the launguage that would go on, on a street in Harlem, then I'd say you'd be fine. Overall I give it four out four stars.


He Got Game, a Spike Lee Joint from 1998. This movie shows the rise of the high schoo basketball star Jesus and his father being able to come out of prison to talk him into going to Big State College. I liked most of the movie but the problems I had with it were thusly. The soundtrack ditracted from the movie quite a bit, when ever they played basketball, it had very heart wrenching type classical music, which made you focus more on the music then on what was actually going on. Also it had a side story about a hooker that was really confusing. The biggest problem was each character would turn shameful just when you thought they were the one you could trust and none of the characters really had any redeeming value which sort of took away from what they were trying to portray with the movie. Which was too bad. Overall 3 out of 4 stars.

The new Dukes of Hazzard was just a no brainer movie that I watched because my friend gave it to me and I didn't really want to think too hard. It definatly lived up to my expectations of being a bad movie, because sometimes you just feel like watching a bad movie. The coolest part was the General Lee flying onto the freeway of traffic. They did that part quite well. If you do want to see the movie, just watch the regular version, my friend gave me the unrated version which was unrated to to their addition of boobies. Don't get excited though guys, not Jessica Simpsons (you'd be surprised how many people have asked me that). Overall I'd give it 1 1/2 our of 4 stars.

The new Fantastic Four movie. This was the second time I watched it, because I did enjoy it the first time. But I do attribute it to my major movie flaw that I will love anything Marvel gives me since I'm a huge Marvel fan. I didn't enjoy it as much the second time because it could have used a lot more action and less characterization. I know that's an awful thing to say, but they didn't have good characterization, so they could have used less of that. I'd put it just above Elektra and Captain America on my favorite marvel movies lists. If you've seen either of those you'll feel sorry for F4 for not getting higher a better one. Overall I give it 2 out of 4 stars. But I do like it.

The Monster Hunter starring David Carradine from 1999, also know as Natural Selction. You might know David Carradine from playing Bill in the Kill Bill movies. My high school buds got on a huge Carradine kick and went to watch all his movies and this was one of them. This movie has little to do with the Monster Hunter as the title suggests and more to do with catching a killer. What's weirdest about this movie is how absurd it is, every character is so completely absurd and definatly made to be that way, that you find yourself laughing at things you really probably shouldn't. If you want to watch a movie that'll completely throw you brain for a loop and make you reevaluate your life, then this is a good one to watch. David Carradine himself was simply hilarious as the bumbling Monster Hunter. I woudn't recommend this to pretty much anyone that will read this, maybe one or two of you could get away with it if you really wanted. Overall i give it 2 1/2 stars out of 4.

I watched this new version of King Kong yesterday. Oh my did it feel like a long movie. The movie started at 10:45 in the morning and we got out of the theater at 2 pm. Peter Jackson sure does like making long movies. I can see why he would want to make this movie though, he likes making movies where he can make long amazing shots and showing really cool action scenes, and if you want to sit through 3 and a half hours then it definatly delivers. This was a very good visual piece, it could almost have been a silent movie, especially near the last half. I really didn't like the fact that they really really badly wanted you to feel the love that the girl had for the monkey. They stare at each other loving for a good half hour. I wouldn't recommend this movie unless you're watching it in a group setting where people are willing to talk through parts of the movie and make jokes. Cause then they'll all shut up when the cool scenes come up. Overall I give this one 3 out of 4 stars.

Friday, December 16, 2005

Internet is down

Main reason why i haven't updated or posted on anyone's blogs, is because my internet is down. they say it'll be down in the whole complex until at the earliest monday. I've found a wireless network and I'm currently surfing on that right now but I have no idea how long it'll last. So that's it from me until I have it a bit more stable.

Saturday, December 10, 2005

A Picture of Me

When I walk around campus, I'll see people from high school and wave at them, they of course don't recognize me, I don't look at all like I did in high school. So I thought, I'll go ahead and put this picture of me and one of my favorite companions from the mission on this entry. Because after all I don't look like this. I especially liked Asmond telling me that he had BAWB and Ambrosia look at the picture and they couldn't guess who it was. So, I'm the one on the right, and that was taken about a year and a half ago. If you take off the glasses, add a big afro, then it'll look like I do now. So for those that do know me, this will look weird to you, for those that don't, this will be your image of me forever, and when you see me on campus you won't recognize me.

Friday, December 09, 2005

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Oh Donny...

This morning meaning Tuesday morning I went to my grocery store. When I say my grocery store I mean the one that's nearest to the house I grew up in. I went in and went to go get some mountain dew. As I picked it up who did I walk past but Good ol' Donny Osmond. Now being as how I grew up in the same town as him this is the fourth time I've ran into him in my life. He is skinnier then he was the last time I saw him, he lost some weight. He was also looked a little desheveled, i think he had just woken up, he grabbed some french bread me thinks. I went to school with his son Brandon and since I was older then Brandon, when I was a senior he wanted to try out a pantomime, since I was the pantomime king I taught him a bunch of stuff, so I can say I taught Donny's son how to act. Ha. But now I shall recall the previous three times I had ran into this infamous Osmond.

The second time I ran into him was when I walked out of the band room door he was out there waiting for his son.

The third time I ran into him I was on a date with a swiss exchange student named Arlette. It was my senior year homecoming. We had gone up to Park City to ride down the Alpine Slide. For those that have never been on this slide, you really should, it is wicked awesome. But Arlette was a huge D.O. fan and seeing him she just melted. He was with his family enjoying the same thing. It was funny to see her fall apart behind him. Much like a 14 year old girl would if she were to be in her ice cream stand and one of the Backstreet Boys bought one. She'd be the first substance to melt.

But the best time I saw Donny was the first. My friends and I were at one of our high school basketball games, as usual we weren't watching but doing something weird. This time we were pretending to beat people up and see what people would do as they passed. We started to beat someone up when suddenly Donny turned the corner. We all just stared at him, he saw us and his spine straightened and he looked to be in the most agonizing awkwardness possible. We continued to stare at him until he passed and quickly turned the corner. Patrick suddenly said, "We could have beaten up Donny Osmond!" We didn't, but it was really funny for us all to have such a weird reaction to his presense.

I wonder if he remembers us...

Friday, December 02, 2005

Epic Mistake

So for those that do or do not know, I'll be attending UVSC next semester because my mother is now a teacher there which means free tuition, it'll cost me more to get a student parking pass then it will to go to college. Wow, isn't that crazy. So, it turns out that my mother is not the only one that works for UVSC.

I was checking my class schedule which I haven't yet added any classes to and it turns out, next semester I'm teaching two beginning level spanish classes. Someone must have made a mistake, unless they really do want me to teach it, I'll have to see how much I get paid.

Thursday, December 01, 2005

One week left

My friend Steve called me today, I hadn't heard from him in a while. So it was good to hear from him, but he had something really important to tell me. He told me of a conversation he had the other day with Becky. Becky had been a friend I knew in high school with whom I had spent some good time with at parties and such, btu we had never really hung out. Steve talked to her about relationships and what not, and asked how her love life was going. She replied that she was in a rut and couldn't find anybody. So Steve asked what she wanted and she said the things she really wants over all else is someone tall and someone who's a nerd. Particularly someone who reads fantasy novels. Steve asked if she was serious and she confirmed that she was indeed serious. So Steve went over the list of friends starting with the most compatible of those two subjects, Andrew. She turned that one down right away. Second up was Sterling, she said she never really knew Sterling.



And so third was me. She said, "You know, I always thought he was a really cool guy, and I'd love to date him." So he said, do you want me to set you guys up, and she said that'd be great. So Steve reiterated this story to me and then asked if I wanted to go on a date with her. So ladies and gentleman date #4 in the past 15 months is next week. I haven't really seen her in about 3 or 4 years so I'm sure we'll have a lot to talk about. And I'm actually a little excited about this one. Though I don't read Fantasy Novels, I do enjoy the stories overall, I just can't ever devote that much time to those books. I've meant to, just never did. Anyways, so that's my big news. I also got my birthday present a week early, I got an iPod off of ebay, and it has pink earphones. I also saw Dana in Two Gentleman Of Verona today and she did really good. It was a grand showing. It was also nice meeting Duchess, she's a full foot shorter then me which is funny. And I beat Uffish and Optimistic in the I know people game, I wasted them. Bwa Ha Ha.

Monday, November 28, 2005

Mini Movie and TV Reviews

Movies I've seen recently.

Rent- Good movie, with even better music. But then, I'm a sucker for musicals. Replay Value: Good

Jarhead- The movie anyone going to war should see. About a sniper in desert storm. Pretty good but also very gruesome. Replay Value: Low

Changing Lanes- Got for three dollars off a recommendation. Pretty good story with crazy mood changes. Replay Value: Maybe Once more

Zatoichi- Awesome movie, some of the best sound in any movie. Replay value: High

Conan The Barbarian- This movie sucks. Holy cow this movie sucks. Though the best part is near the beginning. Conan sees lady, lady invites him in, conan and lady have sex, during sex lady becomes demon, conan throws demon woman in fire, she becomes spirit and flies away, conan brushes himself off, goes on with rest of story, nothing more is said of demon sex woman. What a weird movie. Replay Value: Maybe once for a bad movie night.

TV shows I like right now

The Boondocks (Cartoon Network) - This show is awesome. If you have Cartoon Network you should be watching this show.

South Park - This show really has everything going for it. Parker and Stone are geniuses being able to mix any social commentary with humor and making fun of everyone.

Desperate Housewives - A really good blend of humor with drama and slyness that makes me like the show.

Boston Legal - William Shattner, Betty White, James Spader, and Candice Bergen. Wow, what a great show.

Colbert Report - Stephen Colbert is so funny, I especially like how self serving he is.

That's enough from me tonight.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Needs

Ha Ha, I saw this on Duchess' blog and I did it for myself but I actually found it to be quite humorous so I'm going to do it now. Name has been replaced with Thirdmango for one specific reason... Bum bum bum.

Thirdmango needs a poke in the other eye.
Thirdmango needs to change his classroom management practices.
Thirdmango needs a new name!
Thirdmango needs to answer some questions.
Thirdmango needs help.
Thirdmango needs a consequence for misbehavior.
Thirdmango needs experienced adoptive parents willing to provide daily.
Thirdmango needs a Protractor.
Thirdmango needs to be a member of the Administrator's group on his own computer in order to install antivirus software.
Thirdmango needs to raise about $10000 American dollars in financial backing.
Thirdmango needs to find a pit filled with punji sticks.
Thirdmango needs to do this training for two days.
Thirdmango needs to learn how to spell "allowed" before he ridicules other people's work.
Thirdmango needs change for the bus.
Thirdmango needs someone 1 on 1 most of the time.
Thirdmango needs lots of support on the home front and elsewhere to help him maintain good boundaries.
Thirdmango needs to call me, by the way...
Thirdmango needs everyone's thoughts, well-wishes -- and financial help.
Thirdmango needs a break today... a coffee break...
Is there anything Thirdmango needs?
I don't think Thirdmango needs to be with anybody until he gets his self together. He is to violent. He needs mental help.
Thirdmango needs to be put in prison and locked up for life.
Thirdmango needs to learn that his actions can ultimately destroy the very cause he seeks to protect.

Well that's three google pages of what I need. I'm a mess.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

A True Story


So Today I went with my friend to have some Chinese Buffet. As usual my ritual is to not open up the fortune cookie until after I've finished my meal and then I must eat the whole cookie before reading the fortune. Today was just like all the other days, I finished my cookie, read my fortune, put it in my pocket and went on my way.

About two hours later I was in the Movie Trading Company looking for some movies when I suddenly felt something between my toes, I thought it may be a pebble or a seed. I took of my shoe and in between my toes was a paper, I took it out and it was my fortune from the fortune cookie. It had somehow fallen out of my pocket and into my shoe. And what did the fortune say?

"When there's a will, there's a way."

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Intermission


I stepped on a
nail today.

Then I got a
Tetnis Shot.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

My Mission Story (Abridged)

(Note: This is the abridged version of my mission and my testimony of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. If you have a problem with that then I'll just state an overwhelming "Screw You" right here. Ha Ha. But this is done somewhat by special request, so here is the story and also note that this isn't the best way to be a missionary or to go on a mission, but I did it and I'm glad I did. Oh yeah, and even though this is abridged it's also long, so if you want to skip it go ahead. Oh, and EYA has probably heard all of this before, so sorry.)

This all starts freshman year of college. I was an average college student, you know, the one who lounges around and who doesn't have a testimony of the church he was raised in. The average kind. Yes, I went to church, but I didn't mentally go to church, I went mostly for the fact of going meant people would get off my back, if I didn't go then there'd be something wrong. Then I turned 19. I went to Gerogia that year for Christmas, my grandma being the woman that she is bless her soul, made a comment to me when we were alone.

G: Are you going on a mission?
Me: I'm sure I'll go, it's just not the time yet.
G: Well if you don't go, you're out of the will.
Me: Grandma, it's not about the will, I just can't go when it's not the right time.

That's how my grandma works, she has a jaded view of how the gospel works and if the church were the way she thought is was, then I wouldn't be in it. That was one of my major hang ups, and sort of still is. The different interpretations of the Church that different people give it. I've recently learned for myself that I really need to have my own foundation and keep that foundation otherwise I'll be pushed out very fast because I'm definatly not the model member.

So winter semester came around and everyone around me was getting mission calls, and I realized I'd better do it soon too. Because well, it was just sort of expected of me to do it. So I sent in my mission papers and got my call to go to the New Hampshire Manchester Mission. So when people ask, "why did you go on a mission?" If I answer truthfully I can say, "Too please others and frankly to get it over with." Most people seem to say because they had a testimony or they knew it was for them, nope, not me.

So then there was the temple, and let me say, if you don't have a testimony, do not go to the temple. That almost stopped me from going. Once you have a testimony then I say it's applicable to go and it's a good place to learn. But definatly don't go if you don't have a testimony.

Then I went into the MTC. The MTC was nice because I had a disfunctional group of weirdos. Plus I injured myself, which was nice too. Basically all my memories from the MTC are of pranks and fun things we did such as riding mattresses down the stairs.

Then my first area of my mission, I was such a greenie, I had no idea what to expect. It probably didn't help that my trainer had no tact whatsoever. Those three months were very rough, I didn't want to be there, I had dreams every night that i was back at home talking to friends saying, yeah I'm back, I'm so glad to be home. I would also wish I would get hit by a car so I could go home honorably.

When the three months were up I went to Vermont with my second companion which was a very refreshing moment. It was nice because he was incredibly knowledgeable, he taught me a lot, and he was fun. Oh yeah, and he had a broken knee. He got me aquainted with the area which was the most psychotic area of my mission when it came to crazy shit that can happen in an area. It was the highest rate of inactivity in our mission. 100 active out of 530 people. I was with him for three weeks and then he went home to get surgery done on his knee. I then got my third companion. Now imagine this, here I am, out for three and a half months, still with no testimony and my companion comes in and I have to take charge. But see I thought it wouldn't be too bad, what i didn't know was who I was getting as a companion. This guy had 9 weeks left and he wouldn't talk to anyone. When he would get mad at me he wouldn't say anything to me literally for 5 days. 3 weeks into this companionship I suddenly came to the realization. This was me at the end of my mission if I stayed the way I was. So I made a decision. It was either shape up or ship out.

So I decided to find out if the Book of Mormon really was true, and after that I would decide whether to stay on my mission or go home. So in a matter of about 2-3 weeks I read the whole book of mormon. It's actually quite easy when your companion really wants to sit home and do nothing. So I finished it one night around 1 am, and then I went to pray about it. I prayed for a long while and then when I was done I said amen and I waited for an answer. And wouldn't you know it. I got nothing. I had a pretty strong belief in God at this point that i figured he would be at least kind enough to tell me yes or no, but to sit there and not say anything? So I tried again, sure enough, nothing. So I looked at the scripture Moroni 10:3-5. And when I saw the words real intent I suddenly realized what i had to do. So in my prayer I told God that if this were true and he would tell me so I would definatly know, then I would be faithful the rest of my life and wouldn't falter, but if he said no, I would stop this right now and go home. When I had real intent, that's when I recieved an clear and definate answer of Yes. I can't tell you how it felt because I can't recreate it, but I can tell you, it wasn't a warm fuzzy or anything like that. It was God saying "It's true" to me. Then I knew what i had to do, I had to be faithful the rest of my life, even though I knew there would be a lot of opposition especially among members of the church who wouldn't want me around, which has happened quite a bit.

So suddenly with renewed faith and a willingness to go forward I thought, here we go, I can now be a missionary and the Lord will send me someone who can help me become that. But what I didn't account for was that the Lord works in much different ways. See, now, he was going to test to see if I'd actually do what I said. What came next was the 6 months of Hell. I got a new companion, he was from Canada and he was in my MTC district and I had thought, I really don't want to be his companion. But I got him, he was severly obsessive compulsive and a germaphobe taboot and he had a definate testimony of deep doctrine and not of basic doctrine. He had never prayed but felt he didn't ever need to because he had never felt doubt of the truthfulness of our message. He had little to no social skills, and I was asked by my mission president to see if I could help him in any way possible. So for 6 weeks I tried while everyone in the ward complained to me of his behavior and complained to my mission president of his behavior. So after 6 weeks we split up and I went to Maine and he went to Mass.

Well I got with a "cool" companion. Someone who I thought I wasn't really all that cool, so he decided we shouldn't really do anything, which we did. But he continually smeared my reputation and did everything he could to get me out of there. Well it worked and after 6 weeks I was transfered to somewhere else in Maine. In this area I had a companion who was going home in 6 weeks and really didn't want to do anything. This was the 6 week period that I felt the most insane in. Still to this day I can find a reason why I was in every area of my mission except the 6 weeks in this area. I can't name a single reason why I was there. At the end of the six weeks I thought I would stay there since my companion was going home. But my mission president called me up and had a special question for me. He was wondering if I could go to Mass and serve with the Canadian again, because apparently I was the only person in the mission who could tolerate him. At this point I really didn't care so I said sure and I went to Mass.

In this area was the second time I seriously comtemplated going home. I had done little to nothing up to this point and I was almost a year in, I had many other missionaries besmerch my name and people from around the mission were calling me up to see if it what they heard from so and so was true such as, "Did you really have sex with someone?" or "Did you really go on a drunken rampage?" Also having all the missionaries around me continually saying how bad a missionary I was and that I should just go home because I obviously wasn't accomplishing anything. At the same time my Canadian companion was also going through the exact same abuse and he was sick of it all too. So for 6 weeks we worked together and I tried to help him with his social skills. We just tried to not think about what other people thought and just do what we could. Well after these 6 weeks I met with my mission president and he said, "Well I asked a favor of you and you did it, now you can ask a favor of me, where in the mission do you want to go?" I knew exactly where I wanted to go. I wanted to go to Machias Maine. Machias was known as outer darkness in our mission, the place where you'd never be heard from again because it was so far away. Exactly what I wanted.

So he granted me my wish. I went to Machias. The biggest reason was to get away from other missionaries, because then I could be a real missionary and not have to deal with missionaries who were all concerned about putting other missionaries down so they could get ahead. The 6 months I spent in Machias were the best of my life. When people say "My mission was the best two years of my life," I can say, "Machias Maine was the best 6 months of my life." The Lord finally knew I was ready to go and me and my companion turned on fire. With no other missionaries around besides our district leader 60 miles away the only thing we could think about was the gospel. I was with that guy for 4 and a half months. Together we accomplished so much for the people there and so much for ourselves. After he left I got another guy for 6 weeks who was also very good and we tore it up. In the two years I was on a mission I had 6 baptisms, 5 of which were in Machias. No where else did I understand more fully Love for the people then I did there. As i write this I have such a feeling that I love that city and the area surrounding it and such a need to go back and live there at some point. At the end of that I felt so accomplished and so happy that I could burst.

When those 6 months were over a mix up occured, I was supposed to go to Portland Maine but due to two seperate accidents I ended up going to Dover-Foxcroft Maine with the one guy in the mission that I knew I would never get along with in any situation. In those six weeks he would not leave the apartment unless we went to eat or go buy GQ magazine. He talked to his girlfriend in the branch every night on the phone and would talk to his friends at home ver regularly. I was told to just wait 6 weeks and do what i could, so I used those 6 weeks to study the scriptures and learn anything and everything I could. Which was a good idea, because my next companion was a spitting image of me at the beginning of my mission. We spent 3 months together and had some amazing times and I was able to give him the wisdom I had gained.

I then ended my mission with 6 weeks in my final area with a decent fellow whom I got along with but we didn't do much, he had a laptop and many other distractions and he really didn't want to do anything, so I read my scriptures and played the game Chrono Trigger on his emulator. There were definatly some reasons for me being with him in that area and they were accomplished, but we'll get into those another time. Then I came home.

That is the story of my mission. Probably about twice a week I think, "The mission was really great, but I'm so glad it's over and I definatly don't want to do it again." Among uber Return Missionaries, I don't fit in because I don't have the RM aura, but you know, I'm glad of what my mission did for me and I accomplished some very good things. I'm proud of myself for doing it. So when such things as people calling me a sinner or people generally saying something rude to me in church, it doesn't affect me as much, because I know the church is true and we're all sinners even though we don't like to show it. And anyone who thinks that they're greater then anyone else is just fooling themselves. They don't understand the true meaning. I don't claim to know everything, and I don't agree with everything either, but I know what I know. And for me, that's enough, and someone telling me I'm not welcome isn't going to stop me, in fact it almost makes me want to keep going just so i can smile as they squirm, as they don't understand that they too are just like me.

Anyways, there's my little tirade. I hope you enjoyed entrance into my psyche. Good day and Good luck.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

We are Legion for we are Two Face


Two in One day is a little odd for me. But I have a lot to say.

I think I'd like to address a question or more of a comment Optimistic had a while back on his blog. (Sorry for not posting links to people's blogs, I don't want to have to go throught typing in the html coding, and it doesn't give me an easy link button like it does on pcs.) He had made mention of how people such as me (though he didn't say it was me but I did confirm I was a prime example) are extremely jovial in nature in the real world and yet it's like a two face effect happens on the internet where a whole different personality is exhibited. Now there's a perfectly good explanation for all of this. You ready for it?

He's right.

I am a two face. Well sort of. I may not be Harvey Dent here but I am definatly a man of many colors. It is true that in a group setting I am probably the most jovial fellow you will meet. Yet there is something you must all know. I am a complainer. I'm not a bad complainer, not one of those ones that will complain to everyone, no no. I'm more of a one time complainer. There aren't too many things that truely bug me for a long time, but through the years I've found that if something bugs me I can usually get rid of it by complaining once and getting it over with. I actually enjoy the act of complaining. I find it as a relief, but sometimes I allow something to fester enough that a simple complain won't let it dissappear, and thus I go into the multiple complain, which I do every so often. If you find me doing this, just throw something at me. But I've found that the best possible spot for me to complain is in this blogging world, where writing is the main form of communication. A perfect venue for me to spill my baggage into the river. But also a good venue to find ways of coping with it in different ways and finding thoughts by other people whom I would or would not have thought had insight into the situation.

So, yes people, I am a two face. Indeed a lot of us are, but when you get me alone, you'll find a different side to me, also you'll find my twisted views on reality, which are many for they are legion.

Post the 100th

For those that know me really well, they can all tell you that I'm quite absent minded. For instance yesterday I was thinking the whole day that Saule was going to be at Poetasters and I should bring the copy of Wizard People for him, I was thinking this up until I saw it in front of me and could have picked it up, but what did I do? I drove on over to Poetasters, got out of my car and realized it was not with me, a usual occurence for me, so I drove back and got it. I went to my parents house for dinner on sunday and as I was going for seconds withh my plate in my left hand, I looked down at the table and grabbed another fishcake with my fork. I was ready to put it in the plate when I noticed my plate was not on the table like I thought it was. I asked my mom if she had taken my plate until I realized it was in my left hand. Oh silly me, happens all the time. I forget if I've taken my heartburn medication a minute after taking it and will often take it again. These sort of things happen to me day in a day out, all the time. It almost makes me paranoid, such as when I have valubles in my car, I'll lock the door, walk across the parrking lot then I'll think, "Did I lock the door?" so I'll have to go back and check otherwise it'll bug me the entire time I'm doing whatever I'm doing. Well this past week I had one of the longest and most incredibly odd absent minded moments of my entire existence. Last night I was feeling really sick, it was a very queasy feeling as if I had just swallowed a live skunk whole. But my good friend Huntsman had called and said he wanted to go eat somewhere, plus he was paying since he just got a paycheck. The only thing I could think of that I could eat would be either a subway sandwich or a chicken salad. Well we went to subway and I was deciding whether I'd get a meal or not, as I was looking at the sodas I thought, I should probably have water... ... ...

Wait a second... ... ...

And suddenly it hit me, why I've been sick and my biggest absent minded blunder ever...

I hadn't drunken water in over a week. What? You just don't do that. But somehow, I just had. I mean, I had tiny amounts when I brushed my teeth, and I had a gulp or two at church, but that's about it. Now I am a water connoisseur, I love water. On my mission I made sure to drink about 8 glasses a day and I very rarely got sick. But because of this, there are sometimes flavors of water that I can't stand. Such as the water in my current apartment. Now usually when I have bad water, I'm fine with just getting a carton of water from somewhere else, but my engaged roommate is a Nazi when it comes to the Fridge. If he sees something in there that doesn't really have a purpose to be in there, he'll just get rid of it, unless it's his of course. So I've tried to use the fridge as little as possible. So lately I've been drinking a lot of milk and a lot of soda, but no water. Blimey. So i had the subway sandwich and a whole lot of water, and wouldn't you know it, I felt better.

Monday, November 07, 2005

I finally found that cd I've been looking for

I've been accidently falling asleep a lot lately. Mainly just in the past couple days. It started thursday night when I fell asleep at about 1 am and woke up at 8 am. Then Saturday night at Optimistic's house I fell asleep on his floor for half an hour. Then last night I fell asleep 15 minutes before ward prayer at 8:30 pm and woke up this morning at 5:30 am, when I usually go to sleep. I went full circle. I am a little miffed at it. Oh well.

I found out today that I'm an amazing MadGab player. I was playing with this girl in my ward and it was us two against three others, and I would say it in my slurred tone and she would get it immidiatly. We were a really good team.

I had a revelation the other day, and maybe I'm wrong so I'll leave it up to people's thoughts on the matter. I came to a realization about dating and what not. I think most people want to date and not be pressured into marrying right away. They just want a nice relationship. The problem is is that we all think that everyone else is thinking the opposite, that they want to get married. So say person A wants a nice relationship as does person B. But person A thinks person B wants to get married really bad, so persons A and B would have been able to have a good relationship but because A thought wrongly of B it didn't happen. Just a thought.

I posted this on Blue-Beta but I thought I might post it here. I realized about a week ago that a girl I had a crush on a while back, I didn't really have a crush on the actual her, but more the concept of her. For instance she liked a lot of same music I do, a lot of the same movies, she was a big fan of a lot of the same things I was into. But when I was with her, it always fizzled. Then I realized I liked her for the concept. But I didn't enjoy it as much being with her. I think I do that a lot, I'll put a specific thought of what someone is and draw off of that and make them into a crush. I did just that again just a couple days ago with someone else, I fell in love with a concept of a person, but of course it didn't flourish. I need to stop doing that, because I end up falling before anything has even started.

I'm excited, I got a call from my "ex-wife" last night, turns out the group is getting together on saturday to drive down to Goblin Valley, and we want to video tape the trip, it's going to be awesome, I'll be able to make it into a documentary. This is going to be fun. I'm glad I'll be able to get out of town.

Saturday, November 05, 2005

Not too much today

I picked up the new K-OS cd yesterday and it picks up an official nomination for my personal best album of the year award. This cd is amazing. So many different styles go into this cd, and it's so fluid in between tracks. I'm thinking I'm going to make my own best of 2005 awards, just for my own personal enjoyment. So far I have three nominations for best album of the year. K-OS, being the first, then also Fatboy Slim's Palookaville and Bloc Party's Silent Alarm. I have other nominations, I just need to check if they came out in 2005 or not.

I accidently got on a good schedule in the past couple days. I really didn't mean to, I just got tired and fell asleep at a decent hour and now I'm on a regular schedule.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

The Love Song

Alrighty, it's been a couple days. So first off I'd like to make mention of my awesomo pictures blog at fourthmango.blogspot.com this is entirely dedicated to cool pictures I find on the internet, some may have naughtly launguage so be forewarned, currently though there are a lot of funny Magic Cards on there, I especially like Limecat and once I get to a color printer I will print out Limecat and use it on people. But do know this, I have a big back log of pictures to post on there, so it will be updated pretty regularly.

Today I went to see the student film "This Divided State" about the Michael Moore contreversy. I almost forgot about but checked my email 5 minutes before the college democrats were going to leave so I jumped in my car and left. It was a pretty good film, it was really interesting to see all the stuff that had gone on. Afterwards there was a really good roundtable discussion that I thought was very thought provoking. I played the part of the "uninformed college student" which went over really well, because people there were really into politics and they forgot that the Uniformed also have votes too. I'm not really that uninformed, but if I suddenly give myself a glazed over look, then everyone thinks I am.

I finally watched the final Star Trek movie today. Star Trek Nemesis. It was really good to see a distinct ending to the whole Next Generation crew. It was a good Star Trek movie. It wouldn't have made any sense had you not been a fan of the show, so as just a movie, don't see it unless you liked the show. Because you won't like it otherwise.

So I have got to say, when it comes to music I'm really liking how this year has panned out, there has been some killer music that has come out lately. I'm especially liking how the underground hip hop scene is panning out. Music right now has just seemed to find out that there's a lot more freedom to really do crazy things in music and people will like what you're doing. For instance I am really into K-OS right now. He's a very musical hip hop guy, it's really cool finding that Hip Hop has found out how to have cool music behind their lyrics. It's been something they've needed for sometime, and they've finally come into it. Still the mainstream hip hop is going against these ideals and still going with monotone beats and songs about bitches and hos. Where as the side that I'm really getting into has some really cool things to say. And some really cool music behind it taboot. I'm going to post the lyrics to one of my faves of K-OS, it's called "The Love Song" and as you read it imagine violins, cellos and all manner of strings as well as drums and record scratching in the back ground.

Contrary to popular belief...
This is not a lovesong
It's a sonnet
Damn, it feels good to have people up on it but
I'm just a fool playing with the Master's tools
Learning how to break the rules of this record company pool
Hallucination - I see with my eyes
But my heart's telling me lies
Why do I fantisize?
Why am I telling lies to the people from the stage
Pretending it's all good when inside it's fire and rage
Cuz I can't understand how a man lives off the life of another man
Tryin to pimp the universe - that's a joke
I stay rockin the boat down on my last note
It's murder she wrote
Assassination vocabulary
I see your termination is heavily necessary
I should have known - they do it for funds alone
I do it to break the walls if I fall off then let me know people

CHORUS
It's funny how life can go
First you ride high then you might lay low
Don't get high off your own supply
Someone said first before a fall comes pride
This is my message to the world
Just tryin to reach every boy and girl
Not tryin to say if it's right or wrong
This is not a love song

Lyrical optometrists with 20/20 vision
Are serving rounds like my granny used to serve provisions
Chaotical amneotical fluid
The rap druid is fluent with the art of onomatopoeia
Mans an invisible microscopic topic dropper
When I was a kid I wanted rollerskates and a bike chopper
But alas, pop, pop never thought to keep me in style
Thats why I'm schizophrenic now
So God bless the child that has his own
The harvest we reap is what we sow
Chrome microphone - shoot it
There was a dome of computer digital clones that could be mixed for lots of pistones
Sayin a style's their own when they bite like Mike Furounsville
The sounds ill
Relationship is a mirror
That you see yourself up in and the picture is clearer
That's why I'm on the scene with a mic like Ernesto Guevara
While they exploited nights like Geraldo Riviera
They just...

CHORUS

It's easy not to care what people say
It's harder to pretend and try
Cuz they can only love you from yesterday
I'm looking at the now they pose high
I'm just a man who's walking
They stand around and keep talking
They tried to clip my wings
But wisdom fills so many things
Say it again
I'm just a man who's walking
They stand around and keep talking
They tried to clip my wings
But wisdom fills so many things

It's funny how life can go
Don't get high off your own supply
This is my message to the world...

Saturday, October 29, 2005

Friday

Thanks for the comments on my last post. I was a little scared when posting it that it would be taken wrong. But then, I've only had one post so far that I never did post, and it's just because I forgot to finish it. But thanks.

So in this addition of the Saturday Morning Post, you will now get. My friday, that's right ladies and gentlemen, you're going to get a journal entry for friday October 28th. Because overall, there were some fun things that happened and I want to log it in.

So to start it off, I've already told everyone of my getting up at 1:30 to get to work by 2. So usually, my phone goes off as my alarm at 1:30, I turn it off and then go quickly to do all my morning stuff and I'm out the door at 1:40. Then I usually see the clock in the car telling me it's 1:45. Well this morning my phone goes off and I'm out of the door in ten minutes. When on my way I see the clock saying 11:45. I thought that was a little odd. So I look at my phone and there's a text message waiting for me. And it says.

From:767877

Text often or a lot? Save money when you sign up for an SMS Text Message option. Visit http://sprint.com/pk

I got a spam text that woke me up! A spam text! So I went back and fell back asleep. But really.

So then I went to work. Had a fine time.

Then I went home to get some stuff from my brother, now he has this crazy thing on his computer which is Dance Dance Revolution but it's design for fingers. It's 4 to 5 times faster then DDR and my brother is really good at it, it's absoultly amazing. If you ever see him do this, it blows your mind.

So then I come back to my apartment at about 7:30 and see the thing for my ward's halloween party which I totally forgot about, so I get back in my car and as I'm driving over there I think, Oh, I don't have a costume. But then I remembered I had my elephant hat and golf clubs in my trunk. So when I get to the wilk parking lot I opened my trunk and put on the hat, found my giant "Sean John" red sweat pants were in there, so I put those on, saw my green dart leauge jacket was in there too. Put that on and took out my golf clubs and took that too. It was a cool costume entitled, "Things found in my trunk"

My main goal at the party? Horde as much free candy as possible. Mission successful.

I then went to a Freshman ward party. I've always loved my freshman ward people, but this time was really weird. Because only about 4 of us weren't married, engaged or with a steady girlfriend. The other thing that was funny was only one of the aforementioned couples had only one of the two from freshman year, all the rest were girls who had waited for their missionaries. Overall it was a good party. It was really good seeing my freshman year roommate, he's currently enjoying a long distance relationship.

I came back a little early, stole the 3rd disc of season one of 24 from Angry Block and watched them all. So here's my thoughts on this show. The first four episodes it drove me nuts, because it was so full of tension with no relief at all. It drove me crazy, but I had to keep watching because of the whole cliffhanger thing. It's gotten better as the show goes along, so I'm able to watch it without dying. Though I'm pretty sure I won't get myself into the other seasons.

Then I watched the first 6 episodes of the amazingly brilliant show "Curb Your Enthusiasm" If you haven't seen this show, it is worth it. It's about the life of the Co-Creator of Seinfeld, Larry David. He plays himself and a nuch of famous people play themselves in individual episodes such as Ted Danson and Julia Louis Dreyfus. But the other half of the cast play fake people, for instance Bob Odenkirk plays a retired male porn star in one of the episodes. It's a really funny show. I also noticed that Larry Daviid played the voice of the Manager of the Yankees in Seinfeld.

Then I started writing this blog as I have been uploading all my cds onto iTunes. I'm up to 883 songs and 3.67 GB. And that is all for today.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Girls

So I'm still being a hermit and I'm really enjoying it. Alrighty, so here's some thoughts that have been going through my head lately. First off, I really want a girlfriend. For specific reasons though. Let me explain myself.

1. I want a girl that I can hang out with often, maybe not every day, but at least having the knowledge that I could be with her if I wanted.

2. I want a girl that is willing to experience new things. I have so many things that other people haven't seen or heard and one of my favorite things is showing people these things, and I want her to be able to enjoy that. On the reverse of that I also want a girl who would want me to experience new things, someone who has things that I haven't seen or heard that I can get into because of them. And she doesn't neccisarily have to like all that stuff, just be willing to try it out.

3. I want a girl that isn't in marriage mode, and one that realizes that I'm not either. I want a relationship for the sake of having a relationship and experiencing it and feeling love for someone with out having to worry about all that other jibberish. Now if this relationship goes on for 8-16 months then there might be something to look into.

4. I want a girl to cuddle with

5. I want a girl with problems, that I can help out with, but also someone who has problems and can help me out with mine.

6. I want a girl who's cool with meeting my friends and is cool with me meeting her friends

7. I want a girl who likes driving in the car

8. I want a girl that is a talker and a listener. I'm a listener by trade but I can also be a talker, but when I'm with someone who won't talk I go crazy.

9. I want someone introverted so that we both have walls to tear down

10. I want a girlfriend to gain some confidence back, since I've been overall either unsuccessful or sabotaged.



Is this all too much to ask? The biggest problem right now is I'm back at the point where I always am, without any solid prospects, and I've fallen for people so many times and had my heart broken so many times that it just doesn't seem worth it to even try anymore. When you're 0-15 or 0-20 or whatever, it's hard to get up and try to keep playing the game when your success rate is so low. I'm getting to the point where I'm thinking I may never even have the chance to just have a girlfriend, not too mention the whole marriage thing which we hear about so often.

Speaking of such things, I really want to ask a bishop or some other teacher when they're teaching about marriage why we would really want to get married. I understand all those things about exaltation and such and eternal principles, but I want to hear something else concerning the subject, how about why we even go on dates, why people are so hooked on the money aspect, and why do we really want to get married, in other words what is something I can use to motivate myself in the here and now besides your future will be all good. But then, I am in marriage country and I'm not going to get much else. So in addition

11. I want a girlfriend so that people can ask, why aren't they married yet and I can say, screw off jerkface, in answer to their query.

Ha Ha. I don't really care about that. Anyways.



"So here you go girls of the world, I want a girlfriend, when you look at me, no matter how off putting I am, I really just want to be loved by somebody. And hey, I'll be cute for you when you need me to, I'll even work on the whole giving hugs thing or the whole giving complements thing. Oh yeah, and I intially have a crush on basically every girl i know, I usually figure out if there's anything there right off the bat and then give up on that whole thing, so if you're actually interested, you might want to tell me."

I should take this quotation and pass it out in front of the Wilk. Then everyone would understand.

Friday, October 21, 2005

A bunch of Avatars

As I started writing this, I turned on iTunes and it did a random song, and it came up as The Eels, "I need some sleep" Ha Ha.

So I sorta wanna move out of this place winter semester, but I probably won't.

And now for your veiwing pleasure, my first five avatars on Blue-Beta, and a look at what could come in the future.

First One. Metal Man.








Second, Game Boy, of Captain N fame.








Third, Mayor Jeb from Men in Hats









Fourth, The Sad Clown Jeriah which was on there a little too long. Also from Men in Hats.









Fifth and current, imagine Kirby breathing in Darth Grevious, and you have this.








Possibility number one, imagine Kirby breathing in the President of Mexico.










Possibility number two, a random picture I found.










Possibilty number three which if it had worked would have been my third avatar but the Mayor was my backup.



There you have it.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

New Computer Go!

I'm so excited about my new computer! Here's a picture of it, I will now also include some pictures of note.









This was on my wall in my last apartment.























A Picture of me taken on the mission breathing fire.












One of my companions that had amazing arm strength and balance.













A cool picture taken by me of my companion. He had a digital camera and so we took many pictures together. Maybe next time I'll actually have pictures of my face that are recognizable.

Monday, October 17, 2005

Final post from my iMac

I can't believe this thing can finally go to it's grave. I got my new computer yesterday, it's an iMac G5, and it can run my editing program which is awesome. The only reason why this iMac is still out is because I couldn't get my landlord to put me on the internet until a little bit later today, so once that happens, then my new computer will be hooked up and this computer will go into the corner to be used when I need to get some old info off of it. Other then that it will gain some dust. It has served my family well for something like 6-7 years, so for that it's a good computer, but it's younger brother has taken over.

So since I have had this iMac G5 for a day and a half without the internet I've done the only other thing I could do, I took all the mp3s on this computer and all the ones I had on cds, and threw them all into iTunes. Guess what the bottom thing says on my iTunes now that I've done that. "304 songs, 1 day, 1.55 GB, so I could almost fill up an entire iPod nano or whatever and only use mp3s I have and not include any of my 500 some odd cds. Holy smack.

So in funny news from today, after not going to church I ended up just staying in my room all day. At 5 pm my roommate Frenchie gives me a call, so I answered and he asked where I was since he hadn't seen me all day, they needed me to do something. I said, "I'm in my room" and he said, "Oh, we're in the living room." He felt really embarresed that he didn't just knock on the door. What a wacky fellow. The past couple nights I've wondered whether he rolls around in his sleep or if he smacks the wall when i'ts too loud, I really can't tell. I've told him to tell me if it's too loud, but I don't know if he understands to just tell me. Interesting fellow.

So I had decided that I wanted to see if I could grow facial hair, but after three days it itched so stinkin' bad that I had to shave it, I don't understand for that fact how people can do it, it's so itchy!

I think I've decided to go on a dating strike for a little while, it's too much work and too much money, and I want an iPod, so any money that I would put into dating will go towards an iPod, in fact I think I'll have a bottle that says dating fund, and then once it hits enough to get a 40MB one, then I'll get an iPod. Go Me!

Friday, October 14, 2005

The Annual Rearrange

Everytime I come into a new apartment, the first thing I do is I visualize my stuff in the room and how it work out the best. Then I put it in that way that i've thought. However, after living there for about a month or two I end up rearranging my room to something more effective then i had orginally planned. Last night was that night when I finally do it. So my room is very much different. I'm not a big fan of the fact that I have a smaller room then I did last semester and the fact that I was paying less for it, but this landlord isn't evil so that's fine.

Speaking of rearranging, I called my dad today and asked him about some computer stuff, well it turns out that I can't do my film editing in his office after all. The plan was for me to be able to go in after ten and work most of the night, but he wasn't able to get permission for me to do that, so I would need to go in before ten, which might be fine besides the fact that my dad uses his office a lot. Which means I would be able to do 7 to 10 on weekdays and saturdays, which would mean I'd have to get rid of club meetings and socializing, and that would get rid of the whole purpose of me going to bed late. Since I do so much better on homework after I've socialized and know people are in bed, then I don't think about it, where as when they're ready to play and I'm not, I'll think about hanging out with them while trying to do my homework. It's a runaway train to failure. I know most of you are able to prioritze and say, I'll reward myself, I'll do my homework then I can play. But I can't function that way, I've never been able to function that way, I'll want the prize so much that it'll distract me from my homework and then I can never concentrate on it, however, if I do the prize first then I don't have to think about it any more and I can work on my homework. Anyways, so we thought, what are we going to do.

Now many of you have noticed me complaining at one time or another about my computer. It's an old school iMac, the first in it's class, right when Macs got their act together. However, being as how the computer systems upgrade pretty fast, my computer is now a dimwit of modern society. It can only handle internet explorer 5 and the highest MSN messenger it can handle is 2.0, which MSN doesn't even support anymore, so users of said messenger can no longer log on because MSN has abandoned them. My computer also has a busted cd drive, and so I can't put cds on my computer either, it can do the basic functions, but it does them slowly because it's growing old.

So in an effort to solve both these problems my family came up with a great solution. My dad was just appointed the job of Dean of Undergraduate Education at BYU. Basically he's the one that's in charge of all them GE classes you take. Higher position obviously means more money and since I'm going to UVSC next semester and will get free tuition, suddenly a little money can be used. So, for my birthday my parents are getting me a new computer which can handle the editing equipment. Now when I called my dad today he said he was going to pick up the computer tomorrow and it would be in my possesion by this weekend! My birthday is coming 2 months early. I've really become endebted to my parents, they are really helping me out with what I want to do, and I am really grateful for it. So in two days, I'll be able to put pictures on my blog! Do you know how much I've wanted to put pictures on my blog? But because of IE 5, Blogger doesn't give me that option that the rest of you get. Sad, ain't it. So you can look forward to my own edition of funny signs which I have plenty of, and a bunch more pictures since I'm so generous. In the future things will be rearranged.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Hermit Life / maybe I should sit down

I'm really enjoying my new cds. I got Muse's Absolution, and Of Montreal's The Sunlandic Twins. So this post will be done to the Of Montreal cd which I'm listening to right now.

Lately I've been quite the Hermit. I had moved my tv out to the front room earlier because it was the only one that could play dvds. So when I would have people over, we would watch movies. Well I haven't had people over in a while and I was getting tired of having to deal with my roommates, so I moved it back into my room. Luckily I have cable tv in my room. So after putting it back in my room and purchasing two video games for the Playstation 2, I very rarely leave my room. The most i've been doing besides work of course is going by Optimistic's house and playing games.

This all brings to mind my social life as a whole. I've always had many many friends. It's just in my nature, I love learning about new things and one of those is I love learning about new people and finding friendships. I also like keeping up my current friendships. Problem is, I just don't have any motivation to do this right now. I'm having trouble keeping up with old friends, I'm having trouble making new friends and actually going over to their houses and getting to know them better, and overall my shyness nature is coming back. I haven't had my shy nature in a long time, but it's in full swing right now. So if I'm not in contact with you, now you'll know why, I'm just being very shy, I would really like to hang out with people's more often, I just can't get up the courage to actually call them and say, hey, let's chill. So in the next little bit, if you want to chillage with me, give me a call, cause I can't gain up the courage to do it myself.

And now, I'm going to post the lyrics to the Of Montreal song "The Party's Crashing Us" just because I'm really enjoying that song right now, and I really like the lyrics. Not there is an F word in it, I'm not going to edit it just because, so be forewarned, if you really don't want to read it, it's in the 3rd/Last stanza.

"The Party's Crashing Us"

You’re such a mystery I just want to stand and stare
Nibble on your ear and smell the ocean in your hair
You know you damage me you leave me tangled in a knot
But when you reappear I see Neptunian blues that eyes forgot
Neptunian blues that eyes forgot

I only feel alive when the vu’s flashing alarms going off in my head
I want to grab you and just kiss you maybe I should sit down
No sense in cashing us now
Still I only feel alright when the vu’s flashing bombs going off in my head
I want to grab you want to scream at you no icing me down
The party’s crashing us now
The party’s crashing us now

Oh well we made love like a pair of black wizards
You freed me from the past you fucked the suburbs out of me
And all those ugly days that made us so sick
They are just fossils now we’ve learned the elevating trick
We’ve learned the elevating trick

Friday, October 07, 2005

I thought I'd write a little about some stories I've been working on. More so just so I can keep these ideas out there, but also for others to know what I'm working on.

But first I'd like to tell a sad tale. When I first got into writing it was something like 9 to 10 years ago, and it was all because of x-wars. For a link check my side bar. Because of x-wars I became a writer, and from it I've basically only written mutant type stories. That's where most of my ideas for stories come from is through super powers and such. Well the sad part of it is x-wars has officially died after my being with it for 10 years and it being alive for about 13 years or so. Through x-wars, two of it's members ended up getting married and they have a couple kids and I still keep in touch with them. The reason why it died was being as how it was message board type, the system completely wiped everything clean. Nobody had the gumption to keep going after a hit like that, plus it was on a steady decline the past year anyways. But that's where my two story ideas came from.

My first story is a mix between a pychological analysis and a prison story. It's basically about one mutant who had no control over himself for a number of years and killed many people. He's put in the highest security prison in the world, and he goes through a lot of self analysis. The other 5 main characters are the 5 mutants in the cells next to him. One to his right, one to his left, one in front of him and the two on either side of the one in front of him. There are four others that he can hear once in a while but usually he just hears about them from the ones he communicates with. There's a lot of back story to the story, from stories each of them say. I'm afraid I may never finish this one as I have no idea how it'll start or how to end it or how to make it into a recognizable story instead of just a whole heck of a lot of jumblings. Only two other people have read parts of the story, and it's basically gaurded up in my vault where no one can get at it.

The other one is my way of trying to write a comedic type mutant story. It's basically about one kid who desperatly wants to become am utant. He tries so many things, every day he tries to see if he can fly. Finally after a while he finds out his wish has come true, but in a really lame sort of way. His mutant power? He can unlatch things with his mind. That's all. Buckles are no match for his might and mind, especially since buckles can't fight back. He can also make your pants fall down, but only if you fastened them with a some sort of latching equipment. He finally finds that his power is useful since he can unlock doors. Then he goes out on a search to see if any of the super powered groups will hire him so that he can fulfill his dream of being on a super powered team. That's basically all I have for the story so far, but I find it to be promising.

Other then that I've been writing a lot of screenplays and hopefully will get to filming them, so just so you know, if you have a screenplay and want someone to film it and edit it, I'm your man.

Gadzooks!

So, I am a little different when it comes to the majority of human beings when it comes to weather. I need it cold. I have a hard time doing anything in hot weather, I have a hard time falling asleep, I can't function normally. But give me a nice cold day and I feel good. Air conditiong calms my nerves. But if it gets too cold I can always put on a nother layer, where as when it's hot, I can't just get rid of a couple layers. So last night was one of the best nights of sleep ever because I was finally able to sleep with my blanket for the first time in months. And what happens today? I come into my room and my room is blisteringly hot, why? My roommates really cranked up the heat. So that's not too bad besides the fact that I don't want to pay a high heating bill, the worst part about it is, my heating vent won't shut. Oh mercy of mercies, how can this be?!? Why do I have to endure such evil? Nothing about this apartment has bugged me quite enough to the pint until tonight when I couldn't close it. Now heat is rushing in. I turned the heat off and opened my window as far as it could go, but even that won't help me tonight. Tonight, I'll have to sleep once again without my blanket. Oh horror of horrors. And now for something completely different.....

Bands that I've found out about in the past two weeks which I really like right now.

Of Montreal
Wildchild
K-Os
Mello-D and the Rados

That is all. Thank you for your time.

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

A Long Embrace

As we were hugging
her head against my chest
we knew we were to be together
our embrace lasted for so long
I looked down towards her face
and she looked up to mine
I said I loved her
and she just smiled and said
you haven't trimmed those in a while have you?

A poem by Thirdmango

Monday, October 03, 2005

Two Big Rants in One Large Lump Sum

Toasteroven said to me a while back that the way I write is purple in the triangles thingy. I usually like to believe what that guy has to say. So once again, I'm going into this with a lot to say and I'll probably say half of it, and find another half to say and maybe piss some people off in the process.

First off I'd like to talk about Tact and Malicious intent. Something that has been bothering me about BYU students in general is their inability to use tact and their willing or even unknowing use of malicious intent. In general it seems that when it comes to some form of doctrine or basically any form of something, BYU students seem to lose their ability to use tact. Now I say this is a BYU thing more then just a Provo thing, being as how I grew up in Provo and have found it to be less used in High School then it has in this cauldron of Return Missionaries, General "only mormon's in their small town", and a small band of misfits that live in trees. For instance, I like the tv show Desperate Housewives. Now wait, think about that for a moment and then as if I were there in front of you and had just told that to you, think what you would say to me at that moment, whether you know me well or not. Got it? Did you remember to use some tact in your comment? Or was the first thing you thought of some form of Maliciousness. Now back to this, I enjoy Desperate Housewives, in it's first season it was the highest watched tv show in the nation each week. I missed the first episode but my mom saw it and told me I shoudls ee it because it looked to be really good. The basic plot line was a bunch of people in a neighborhood where one of the women end up dead, and everyone wonders how such a wholesome woman could be dead. So the rest of the nighbors find that their lives aren't as secretive as they thought and then try to find out how this happened and find out about each other in the process. Now how many of you have ever watched this show? And of those who haven't how many of you have very strong feelings about this show being absolutly horrible. I mean look at the title, it sounds like a porn movie. Of the four main characters let's see how many adulterous moments each of them have. First girl, none. Second girl, none. Third girl, none. Fourth girl, plenty. Anyways, now that that's behind us. I didn't really want to get to much into the actual show, just the fact that I enjoy it and I feel okay about watching it with my mother.

Anyways, one week ago I was watching the season premire of this show and when my roommate came in and asked what I was watching, I told him and he looked like I had just farted a noxious fume. He promptly told me how such shows are degrading our society, how it spoils the sacred institution of marriage and how I was a sinner for watching said program. I was confused by his comment, and quite preterbed. So I decided to tell a couple of other people in my ward about it, I either got the same comment or the same face as well as a "you are a sinner glance." When I watched the first season of this show winter semester, I told a couple of my high school friends, none of which like the show. They all just laughed and said, Okay. Then they were on their merry way, and we were talking about something else, no sense of, "You are so going to Hell."

On Blue Beta today "Iris" posted a comment which goes along perfectly with what I'm saying. The topic is titled Homework on Sunday, but the way this person says it is so tactless. And I quote:

So, I was at a ward luncheon a minute ago, but mentioned I had to leave early because I have loads of homework to do this afternoon (and now I'm wasting more time on Blue-Beta, but that's another issue). Anyway, one guy spoke up and said, "Isn't doing homework on Sunday a sin?" I was a little taken aback by the bluntness of his comment.

But then she goes on to talk about whether you should or shouldn't do homework on sunday. Now with an issue like this, many of us can relate. How many of us have either raised the question or had it raised to us. And how many of us have heard this phrase at some point, "Isn't doing homework on Sunday a sin?" especially after saying you were about to do said practice. I'm pretty sure most of us have heard this at some point. This comment is loaded full of prejudgement and has no tact to it. It's almost as if he's saying, "Ah, you are about to sin, and I being better then you, I'm going to correct you on this decision by stabbing at your conscience with a rusty shiv." It lacks the caring that we as human beings are supposed to have. What happened to the, "You know, you're a good friend of mine, and I feel strongly about this subject, and I'd like to know how I can help." Or some other phrase that actually shows some amount of caring for the person instead of a sun soaked judgement juiced baseball bat. Then if the person obviously doesn't care that much, just drop it, and wait for a better moment to bring it up or just let someone else do it that actually knows the person.

How many of you as kids weren't allowed to watch The Simpsons. Now of those who said yes, how many of you watch it a whole bunch and think it's a very funny show? Do you remember why you weren't allowed to watch it. As one lesson went in Deacon's Quorum as a kid, "Bart Simpson is what is wrong with our society, no morals and no judgement for his wrong doings, this shows the family in a misjudged light and we as human beings shouldn't have anything to do with it. This show is just plain bad." (I don't remember if these were his exact words but I do remember most of what he said, being as how I was an avid watcher of The Simpsons at the time.)

Another episode in the tale of my roommate was when I watching "Best in Show" on Comedy Central, he saw the Comedy Central logo. He basically went through the same tirade as before with Deperate Housewives, and why the ol' CC is against our value system. Does he really want to help me repent and come unto Christ by telling me what a horrible person I am for things I do? Could we as humans maybe think to use a little more restraint and a little more tact now and again and understand that we as humans don't like being told we're dumb, stupid or evil. When that happens we back into a corner and and lash back with spite. It's how we as humans defend ourselves from verbal attacks. I almost wish that these people would have some sort of sin they commit that it takes them a lot of repentance to go through just so they can understand what it feels like and how best to try and help someone out. After reading over this again, it makes me sound as if I feel bad about watching CC or DH, but I do not since I don't think what I'm doing is wrong. I don't find anything wrong with it besides maybe retina burnings or worshipping a false comedic idol with it's pants down. I just want to convey that people go on missions to leanr how to love people and learn how to help them through kindness, and sometimes people come back or people start out in general by being some sort of (un)knowing animal of spite and ego, relentlessly looting villages and spouting their ego propaganda. So remember, more tact, less malice.

Now for the malicious part of my entry. How many of you didn't see that coming?

----

As I wrote this my internet went out, I'm afraid I may not be able to post this until the morning. I sure hope not.

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I went upstairs today. I live in a downstairs apartment. It's a dank hovel of darkness and forbodence, but I love it like I would a little child as he sucks his thumb. Upstairs is an aparment, almost identical to ours in layout, only the bathroom is a noticable difference, being as how ours has the light switch right as you come in where as there's has it further into the room and around a quick corner, as well as a spot in the wall with a well worn indentation resembling a forehead. Anyways, I went upstairs today and to my amazement there was "Petra" of board of fame sitting at the table. I had just seen her only days earlier as I hung out with her and a few others as we played a game of Trivial Pursuit. She could not stay long after I arrived for she was off to watch a truely attrocious movie for her need of massichistic pleasure. I took her place at the table and she left. After speaking with the guys there one of them told me of Petra saying that I was a "Board Groupie", I understand Petra and I give her no ill will at this comment, but it did put a resentful black spot in my heart for which there is no cure and I will surely die within a week. However I wish to speak a little bit about the 100 hour board. I may be disbarred for my comments, but such is the need of me to relay my current thoughts. I haven't read the board in about 3 months, one in part to my computer crashing every time the 100 hour board appears (I do check my email and BB mid day on another computer which does not crash at the sight of the board), but also second in the fact that it just is not enjoyable. I now use it every once in a while when I want an opinion for a question that I don't want others to know it's me asking it but that's about it. I am friends with many of the people on the Board and hope they find no disrespect with these comments. There are two very vivid reasons why I just don't find it enjoyable. The first is the Board holds a very sarcastic nature and it clings to it's sarcastic nature like a young lion cub sucking for sustanance. It just won't let go. When did Saracasticness take a front seat to the ever popular wit and humor of western society? It seems every writer needs to post a sarcastic comment of some kind each day to fulfill a quota. A question answer oranization needs to do two things, they need to answer questions and they need to know how to entertain people. People will come for the Q&A and they'll stay if they're entertained, and telling them some inside joke they don't get or giving them a sarcastic answer isn't going to entertain them.

The second thing in which I'm finding to be unenjoyable is the overpowering sense of superiority and ego that goes along with the great calling of being a board writer. Everyone has a sense of self satisfaction when they are able to answer somebodies question, it gives us a sense of accomplishment. But when that power gets to our heads, we start to lose sight of why we did it in the first place and it becomes an ego fueled addiction. Board writers have an amazing power, they are able to give answers to things that people don't know the answer to. That's an invigorating feeling. I know, I love being able to answer questions people have about film styles and to give them recommendations, but when you start to feel better then someone else because of your knowledge, then it starts to seep out and you start to stink. I had introduced one of my friends to the board, a while back, and he said to me about a month later, "Sure they're supposed to be annonymous, but does that mean they have to be stuck up as well?"

Once again I'd like to stress I don't mean disrespect by this, I just think the Board would be so much better if those feelings of ego and sarcasticness were filtered out. It's like a football team, if someone sucks then it ruins the whole team and the fans stop coming because it's not enjoyable seeing a team that can't seem to get things together. There seems to be politics behind the scenes that are seeping out in writing as well, just remember why you wanted to do it in the first place, remember to when you were just a "Board Groupie" and why you read the board and why you wanted to write for it, and then write like that. Cause nobody wants to be told they're stupid. No one wants to be stereotyped. And elitism just doesn't work.

And now you are allowed to berate me and kick me in the seat of my pants. Because that is what a comments section is for, and if something really did urk you, make sure to tell me about it and we can work it out like human beings instead of having to place blame and call each sinners.

Sunday, October 02, 2005

Quick Comment

Thanks for all the comments on sleep. Good to see there are people out there.

Monday, September 26, 2005

Mornings

Tolkien Boy said...
If I sleep in past eight I feel that the day has been wasted.

4:45 PM  

I thought I'd send a general reply to this comment. More so of a questionare type post. Oh yes, and thank you very much for the comment TB, it has brought up my current thought process which I am excited about. I have never really understood mornings. Think about mornings and what you do with them. Take into account Tolkien Boy's statement. I can honestly say, I am dumbfounded personally by his statement. I can sort of understand it, but also, I really can't understand it because I don't know how it feels like to feel like I've wasted away a morning. Mornings have never been good to me, I'm always grumpy and I always feel sick. On my mission it was horrible because I would get up and study, but it would all just fizzle through. The times I've always been able to get the most work done has been while I'm most aware and that's after being awake for a couple hours. So I guess you can see my connundrum here, I don't think I've ever enjoyed a morning. Maybe one here or there when something special happened but I really can not see the positives to mornings. Here are the only things I can think of which could be positives. 1. Better selection of classes. 2. Knowing that your day is half over when you're done. 3. Having lunch with someone.

Really I can't come up with any more. But I think the major difference for me and TB's statement, is I truely believe the beginning of the day to be when I wake up at 1:30. In his mind, and I'm only hypothesizing here, he could be saying, days are composed of a set number of hours from 8 am until about midnight and those are the hours in which things must be done. But what I have done is set it at 1 pm til 5 am. All the things I need to do in a day can be done and I can do them happily by setting my hours to this schedule. I like to wake up and not see people for a little bit. I also like to after socializing have a bunch of time to journalize, or organize or watch night time tv which is ultimatly better then morning or daytime. It works so well. And for some reason, now that I've switched to this schedule I feel like my day has more to it then it did before.

So I'd like to get people's thoughts on this, what is your take on it, and if you could do it like I'm doing it and still function, would you? Or maybe even a more hypothetical situation, for those who do wake up every morning without fail, suppose things were to be easier and make much more sense if you trained your body to get onto my schedule, would you do it? Just curious here.

Now if only I were at the other 75% of schools in the country that have libraries open all night. Then I'd be all set.